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Nik11 Offline OP
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Need advice...

Wife went to her apartment and sent me photographs of the play room of my daughter. To which I replied that the room looks amazing.

Then before finally leaving, she messaged me ( as I was in office) about the stuff that needs to be done in our apartment where we were living till now.
Took everything and just left the dress I had gifted her last year frown
Then when she went to OMs place, she messaged me how our D was doing and asked for her photographs so that she does not miss her.

I clicked some and sent and she liked the photographs.

Is this how we are supposed to interact ? and Am I doing right by answering her messages because these are pertaining to our D.
Anything else I should keep in mind while communication with her?

Vets, your advice is very appreciated.

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Vik, a small distinction.

While W's request was ABOUT your D, the request was not FOR your D. Your D should come first in everything, but this particular case your W was asking about your D as a way to interact with you.

If she does not have photos of her D on her phone to look at when she misses her that's weird.

You didn't do a "bad" job here, but wanted to draw that distinction so you're aware in the future. You should absolutely be present and communicative when you're communicating about your D's well being. But in this case it was really just serving to make your W feel better. Your D did not gain anything from this interaction. I doubt she even knew about it, right?

Next time you could let W know, "D is doing very well today" and leave it at that.

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Vik. Take your time. No need to respond immediately. If she questions it, "been busy" or something similar. A picture occasionally is fine. Do not be at her beckon call. General guidance: informational texts need no response. Texts with w questions answer, but in as few words as possible. Yes or no questions get yes or no answers. Respond on your own time. IE not right away.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
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Please start a new thread and link both threads together. Thanks!



http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2846783#Post2846783

Last edited by Cadet; 04/25/19 02:41 PM. Reason: Link

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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