Old Dog, that sounded harsh on my part. It wasn't meant to chastise you. I just bought a new phone over the weekend and then had to get all my stuff transferred over. It was exhausting and I was amazed at the amt of time I put into it.
I work in healthcare, there are many people who put little effort into their health.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
Great reflections here! This will be quick - I took the day off to finish painting my D21's room before the flooring goes in tomorrow.
FWIW, I do this reframing exercise all.the.time. Periodically (and more frequently than I'd like) something crosses my path that really irks me. Like a stupid skateboarder this morning who blew through a stop sign and I almost hit the dumbass, who was also unapologetic and seeming not to care. But other times, it's stuff that I'm projecting outward. I have to do that line of questioning to get to the bottom of things. All those perceived responses? Conjecture and putting words into his mouth. Maybe they would be true. But then again, maybe not. At the very least, his not giving you answers would be the red flag waving that you'd need to dig deeper for answers. Not accepting anyone's word at face value if your gut tells you otherwise. Saying no is incredibly empowering when it is what your gut tells you to do. It's also really hard.
Sometimes, people will get on your case for not doing their bidding. Hold your ground. Others will project. In the beginning, it was REALLY hard for me to distinguish between their projection and the truth. I'm talking several years to work on this one, so don't be afraid of doing the work over a period of time. It takes this long because our filters are or were broken, MB. You have to teach your filter and then pay attention to it. I know Bug told you some months back that Al-Anon would be a beneficial group. This is the kind of thing that Al-Anon works on, because it's an enabling behavior that causes harm to self. Sometimes it's just easy, because I ask myself who has Betsey's back? If the answer is that obvious, well, I'd be a dumbass not to follow.
Great introspection, folks. Keep going. Don't be afraid of the truth, friends. It's the information you need to have your own back. Pretending it isn't doesn't protect you. YOU protect you.
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
It wasn't harsh bug. In fact think I need harsh at times ... possibly most of the time to galvanise me into action. Maybell knows this and has challenged me on it.
Point me in the right direction and whack me on the back with a 4x2 to set me off :-)
The stupid thing is, I know it too but I guess I don't feel I'm worthy or deserve it. I've asked my IC to help me with this. Specifically, I said to him "I talk the talk, but don't walk the walk." I want to be able to take an active part in my life, not just drift and let others decide my direction like I have too often. Good talk, now where's the action?
M: 57 / EW: 52 T: 21, M: 8 S: 18, S: 15 Bomb: 1 Jun 14 EA Aug 2014 I think PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
