Any time a woman has come on strong with me it has never worked. If I send them a t Xw and they don’t respond I never text them again. The same applies to emails as well. I do treat it like a game of tennis and if they don’t hit the ball back game over. If I feel a little bit of attraction I will go on a second date. There have been some i immediately knew it wouldn’t work, saw the date through but then told them I didn’t feel an connection. It is a numbers game and I do believe that you will attract the right type of person into your life based on the vibe if you give off. I have done a lot of reading on sexual market value and I do think there is a lot of truth to it. Hang in there there will be others.
Joseph appreciate your comments! see that's the twist on this one...she has always quickly and happily replied to me text wise, BUT she did just stop calling me. Was that because she lost interest, did she want me to chase, who knows...
As I say I'm definitely just fine if nothing comes of this and being so apparently is the most positive/alpha like way that I could be in this situation. It would be unfortunate for us to not meet at least once and see what's up, I think we would connect very very well, but it just may not happen. If she contacted me now or whenever I'd be totally content/happy to hear from her...no hard feelings from me. Will my absence cause her to wonder...no idea...I'm just doing what I need to do for me by moving right on along living my life. Worse case, there will be another lady that comes along down the line. I learned from my WW sitch and the time I've invested in myself and trying to become a learned partner for relationships, I have SO MUCH more strength in being alone and being fine than I've ever had before in my life and for that I'm eternally grateful to all of you and the support you've provided to me to get me there.
The 1 thing have learned with old is that everyone has a different agenda and what happened could be more about her than you. Some girls never want to meet they just want a pen pal, the attention. Others are rebounding and just want someone to fill the void to help them get over someone. Others just are looking for sex. Some are looking for a R. Others are just casually dating. While some might have been on 5 or 6 dates with someone else, are still dating others but are really close to being exclusive with one person. In my experience if they just drop off the face of the earth there was someone else. Unfortunately I have experienced the majority of the scenarios. That is why it is best to go slow, don’t get emotionally invested early and over time people will show themselves.
Here is what I would do. Wait until Saturday to hear from her. If not call/her text her and ask her when she is free to get together. If she gives you dates then make a definite date. If she says shes not interested or doesn't respond then walk and never look back.
Joseph yep in the OLD world I've experienced just what you say. This was not a pure OLD stranger meet really as we were both "vetted" by a mutual friend. The who knows what her deal is definitely is valid in this case, but each of had intel on the other from a trusted friend.
LH...yeah I like that plan, although I am right now more inclined to just let it go. If she's interested she knows how to reach me. I'm the prize and if not her, some other lucky lady will have a chance with me some day. I'm in no rush and definitely confident and happy no matter what happens. Feeling like I'm exhibiting some positive, confident actions in myself by not chasing her, being needy AND that it's not a game, but just rather how I truly feel has me feeling very strong and good about myself.
Yeah for sure I do understand that. I did read Corey's book in one day btw. Plan to read it on repeat as is recommended. I can see where some of his advice could be controversial, but I feel like I did pick up many solid pieces of knowledge from having read it. In particular his information to men about giving and the need to continually give throughout your relationship, as an LBH that really struck a chord with me. I can see where some of it may come off as "bro knowledge", but he makes some very good points on things I didn't realize until I read it.
To me and perhaps more so in his youtube videos or blog postings, there's a bit too much foul language relative to a man's goals with a woman. It comes across a bit too locker room and disrespectful towards women. Now that's not to say that men talking don't talk like that because they do, but if I'm a gentlemen interested in a long term relationship with a lady, the way he says some things comes off too "bro" and more like "how to score with chicks". Overall I think his book it much less vulgar and as a result reads less like "how to score" and makes a better impact.
I can sympathize with the learning curve that goes into communicating with someone long-distance and the other person is hot-and-cold and you're left to wonder what's going on. I wish there wouldn't be this intricate set of rules that one has to follow and a certain game that has to be played where if you make one minor wrong move you're out. You sound like an honest, sincere, great man. If someone likes you they're lucky to receive your affection in return. I can't believe that a few text friendly text messages could be such a turn off but apparently they are. There's someone with whom I've been communicating online and he sent five text messages back-to-back last week and I didn't mind. Then however I complimented him on something and he stopped responding. Is he busy? Is he shy? Is he dating someone else? Is he embarrassed? Did I make myself appear too interested? It's not about trying to rekindle a relationship that never was a real relationship but just trying to understand how this whole thing works. I'm sure though you'll figure out whether things can proceed with the current women with whom you've been in touch and you'll be prepared for whoever you meet next!
