Just keep swimming, I think I can, I think I can #

[Gerda]

I am praying for you too, Marina! Please tell us how you are!

I was thinking the other day about how I had cancer and how thankful I was that I got to live because if my kids had lost me and ended up with MLC dad, God knows what would have happened. And that even now, if I have to lose them part of the time, it's so much better than if they didn't have me to come back to. Even if you only see your kids for a little bit of time for now, they will see that as a lighthouse in the darkness, and it will sustain them. You have maybe even a more important role to play now. You are even more important in a way now. Have courage!

[marina7]

Peacetoday and Gerda,

Thank you so much for ya time and
Checking up on me.

I am taking it a day at a time and being
There for Trios.

I see them and they just also don't understand

S10 really thought he was coming home but
S10 hug me and said thank you mommy for
keeping us together.

S9 and d10 also lost and they are angry of course
Why does W and OW have to stay with them.

S9 and s10 said they don't even tuck us in or hug us.

D10 said sometimes d10 eats and sometimes doesn't
I ask why. D10 said W makes things they 3 don't like
And W and OW basically don't give them other options
Only option is eat what we made or go to bed not eating.

I understand when ya say be there lighthouse I just
Listen and say Sorry trio's you going through this.

In earlier post I stated I didn't like GAL, GAL and W smiled
In court and infact they hugged. I am still in shock
.
I been going to therapy as always and taking care of
Apollo and church. It's been rough as W seems still
To want to argue about anything. W sent an email
Stating she wants the clothes back.

So like today I pick them up,help with homework and
Make sure they shower so W wants their dirty clothes back.

I just shake my head like at all..

So this weekend I get a text from biological mom
In text stating
BM, M I am worried about you since now W and you
ain't together, when you where with W I never worried
Because W is good to you. I am not sure what's going on
But please come back to hometown so I can get you
In rehab and take care of you. Not sure what drugs
Your doing or how bad your drinking but we will take
Care of you. Love Mom

Yelp this is the text message I get from Bio Mom
So W has contacted my family who I haven't
Spoken to in over 7 yrs since adopting s9 and d10

I didn't respond but from text W has told them am an
Addict and drinker.

Wow like wow. I honestly thought W was a WAW or MLC
But now it looks like W could be a narcissist or physopath

W has literally drag my name to anyone who listens
Now to contact people I haven't spoken to in years in more
Crazy. But does it surprise me No. One of W cousins
Warned me how W is a liar and Nuts to please be careful
And watch my back.

W seem to want to destroy me for some reason but
I have not given W the satisfaction or won't
I ignore.

W at drop off wants to knock on window I have drove
Off twice if W wants to talk we now use a court
Mandated app for divorce parents which I ask

If W keeps getting out of car I will then ask for drop off
And pick up at police station. I am mentally
And physically exhausted with W.

Again Thank you to those who have followed along.

I know my story is not done yet. I am just standing still
For the moment. I praying for a Miracle soon so then
Financially I can hire a new lawyer. My lawyer didn't
Want to go head to head with GAL but she does believe
W and GAL became friends. So now I need to get a lawyer
Who will help me win this fight for wrong doing.

As I stated GAL has an organization for undocumented
Mexicans and W is very involved as they walk the march
For equal rights. So again many things that are wrong.

But I also know God has his plan.

Gerda, yes I know my kids will always need me that
I know and I will always be there for them

And yes I understand cancer as life is short. I have
Lupus and MS and do infusion every 3 months
But I view life differently I now know life is to beautiful
I thank God every waking moment.

[peacetoday]

(((((((((((((((((((Marina)))))))))))))))

I am so sorry to hear this-

keep praying and hold on-

I cant believe W and OW will be able to keep it going for long

Continue to seek help and maybe God will put a solution in your path-


I just had someone in my life create havoc..a friend that was not really a friend-

they meddled and created some events. not asked for-that would have turned out more to my favor had they minded their business
,,I know how much this all hurts

while God lets things happen..there is always another season

especially if we do the right things-
You are handling things good

I got a thought

What if W saw you having fun with your alone time?
just a thougth

would she still want the kids?
is she doing this as some kind of revenge?

maybe we can get some feedback here

[marina7]

Peacetoday

Is mind blowing when I see W behavior
Many would think I left W, I was the one who cheated

W behavior is to spite me to hurt me. Again not sure
What I done to have so much Hate towards me.

So yes everything W does is to get a reaction
Even now after court, W still coming over
to car getting out, wanting to talk or treating kids horrible

I realized, Fine W wants this am going to give it to her.
I can tell you this Much having Trios is not easy
I always had more patience with kids. So I wonder
How this is going for W and OW.

Ow doesn't have kids so this is New for her.
So let's see how W and OW becoming a family works.

I have never been a party person or drinking.
My stepmom could tell ya. At 15 I would be home
Watching HSN with mom or movies in fact she push me
To go out more. So that part I am struggling with. Even
When I was working, I would work and go home and usually
Shop on Amazon if needed and when W and I was together
W did the shopping and grocery which she loved and still does.

I been doing longer walks with dog. And sometimes catch a
Movie or crab lunch with friend. But usually home by 3pm.

[Gerda]

And yes I understand cancer as life is short. I have
Lupus and MS and do infusion every 3 months
But I view life differently I now know life is to beautiful
I thank God every waking moment.

You are such a beautiful person. It's so clear that God is walking with you.

I was really worried about you so I am glad to see your post though everything you are saying is so shocking. I will write more later, had a conversation with a friend who was in a lesbian marriage and has been in a horrifying custody battle with her W. They are on the forefront of the fight for gay rights in this area so she had many thoughts but most of them were about how horrible any custody battle is. More later!

(((((MARINA)))))))

[peacetoday]

M

I would consider being free spirited and upbeat
less available and busy on your days free
find a support group to join and make some friends-

when you see W, be cheerful grateful and upbeat
fake happiness in front of her smile
let her wonder what you are doing in free time

Take a mystery vacation and visit your stepmom

If she ask you how you are
"Im doing great making friends having fun thanks"


Try new strategies until something works-
I cant see her keeping the kids for long-

[peacetoday]

Like I see her switching the situation if you become too happy and free with all your time

I may be wrong but if her goal is too get you for some reason or be happier than you ect..

then she wont like seeing you having so much fun-and free time to play and make new friends-
she may then prefer to see you stuck home with 3 kids

[kate11]

No advice but lots of support! Your situation is so difficult. Continue doing the best you can.

[marina7]

Thank you,

So I need all advice, I know there's
counselors her or therapists.

So if ya remember W picks on s9 alot

My biggest concern is him as W doesn't pick on s10 or d10

S9 is very free spirited he speaks his mind and doesn't
Sugar coat anything. S9 is the honest one. You can't buy his
Love.

Well I am working on me in therapy and o e big issue is
Due to W mental abuse and some physical I have PTSD
When W knocks on window of car or approaches me
I get like a anxiety very nervous. And I shut down emotionally.

Well yesterday I get a message from my lawyer stating
That s9 is going to a hospital because he told W and OW
He going to kill himself.

This is very alarming, How does a child who was happy and
His school and therapist will tell you he is a happy kid.

And W and OW now stating he is mental. This is something I
Brought up to GAL and I was concerned because W has stated
To me and his sibilings I am putting you in mental hospital.
So for W to do this am in all. How can she do this.

Why is the GAL not questioning this. S9 was ok with me great in
School and sports and simply loved. He now being evaluated by
Psychiatrist.

Am lost. I ask my lawyer her response is this is normal for
Kids who been adopted and divorced parents. Am at all with
Everyone response to this.

[Gordie]

In addition to lawyer

I think you need to talk to your family court judge

Or court appointed social worker

Warning that social worker is supposed to not to take sides

This is very serious

Prayers for you and s9