Today would be the only day as she is out of town for work tues through fri and I leave to go out of town on Friday morning. I would have been inclined to ask last week if I felt she was more interested than what she is acting. To your point earlier G she is interested but not over the top to where she is blowing up my phone, so I just feel less is more with her and taking it Uber slow is the way to go.
F- I mean I guess she could be but there is nothing that would indicate she is remotely concerned. I am sure she is confident that I will eventually reach back out again and make our next date. IMO if she was concerned she would reach out at some point to just say hi, ask me how my week is going, etc. She has multiple options and I am just one of them.
I am not complaining or mad it’s just the way it is....I get it and understand. I had another woman hit me up yesterday that didn’t respond to my email about 2 months ago. She has not been active online in a while so I assume the guys she was with didn’t work out.
The truth is, you can only get so excited after one date. I would worry if she was over-the-top interested after one date.
With me and my new guy, I was interested after the first date, but it wasn't like fireworks going off all over the place. It really built up over time, getting to know each other, and spending more time and having more dates. Now, we have that really strong chemistry on all levels.
I find that fireworks on the first date usually fizzle out pretty fast. It's good to keep in contact and interested, but the excitement will build after more than one date.
And stop ASSuming why she didn't answer your email 2 months ago. Maybe she wasn't active because it was "screw this, I need a break" Or maybe it didn't work out with someone. But it doesn't matter.
If this new girl isn't as interested as you would like her to be, or isn't reaching out the way you would life, maybe she just isn't for you and it is time to move onto the next. You have to really measure your expectations.
And stop ASSuming why she didn't answer your email 2 months ago. Maybe she wasn't active because it was "screw this, I need a break" Or maybe it didn't work out with someone. But it doesn't matter.
And maybe also life stuff happened, or work, or friends that needed help...who knows?
I'd also throw in that you're expending a lot of emotional energy and taking up a lot of brain space speculating. I might have said that before? If I have, I apologise, my brain is pretty fried at the moment.
It is what it is, at this point in time. Until you get to know someone better you might not ever get to know the circumstances of why they're not getting in touch sooner/been in touch sooner. It might be simple, it might be a really weird reason. But who knows. And does it affect you now, at this moment in time? And your plans for yourself?
Why not use that energy and brain space for something that's good for *you*, at this moment in time and/or in the immediate future. Instead of filling your time with speculating and imagining and tangling yourself in all sorts of maybes, what nots, perhaps and what ifs.
I feel tired just reading about what might, or might not, be going on...
Seriously, when I met the man I'm with now (and have been for almost two years now), we chatted a tiny bit online, and just for a short while. He cracked a few jokes, made me laugh, and suggested meeting up. I said yes, we had a lovely chat in person, there was *a lot* of chemistry...much more than our online chats. And that's what it's about really, you have to look at the other person in the eyes, be with them, to see if there's any chemistry.
After our date I messaged him that I'd had a lovely time and would really like to seem again. It was that easy and straight forward, no games, no mind reading, no tying oneself in knots.
In the previous six months before I'd ever even started talking to this wonderful man, I'd been chatting to someone else. We chatted a lot online, and for a long time. He was funny, sharp, obviously talented. If he'd asked me out at some point in those months that we'd been chatting, I probably would have said yes, particularly early on. Then it just got to the point where it was obvious that he wasn't going to ask me out and there was some issue as to why he wasn't asking me out. No idea what it was, he never told me. It could have been anything: lack of confidence, circumstances, he was still married, he had a girlfriend, he was a figment of his own imagination...who knew? And to be honest, I didn't particularly care. The bottom line was he didn't ask me out, I never met him, and now I absolutely wouldn't dream of chatting to him.
My point is that he put some sort of obstacles in the way of my meeting up with him. They might have been real, they might have been imaginary...I've no idea. But the outcome was the same essentially. Make things overly complicated and you'll end up turning people (women) who like things that are straightforward and uncomplicated cold. And you'll miss your chance.
If they then turn out to be not worth your time or energy for whatever reason, so be it. But you need to get to that point first.
I really am ok and was just journaling more than anything. I have enough going on in my life to keep me occupied.
My goal is to not complicate things however IMO the women are the ones making things more complicated than they need to be. I am just trying to read the signs they are giving off and handle each situation differently as they come.
Blondy....has never once initiated contact outside of her initial interest. We started communicating on 9/20 and have went on 1 date in a month. It appears that I am not a priority to her so why should I put a ton of effort into her? I am not saying it bothers me but obviously there is something going on with her which is why she is taking it slow. I don't want to speculate what that is but the signs are the signs.
New girl.....way too early to tell, she initiated contact with me yesterday and even sent the first email. We sent two emails and she hasn't responded to my last email that I sent around 1 yesterday. Again I don't want to speculate but it is what it is....I am not going to send her another until she responds. Why she has been dark for 24 hours? Who knows. It's on her at this point, I definitely don't think me asking her "Where she was from" turned her off after two emails but whatever. At that point you are simply trying to build a little bit of rapport so in lieu of sending nude pics of myself or cussing or whatever (which I didn't do) she doesn't appear to be over eager to respond.
The point is that I don't feel that I am the one playing games. I am simply reacting to the level of interest I am getting from the woman I am interacting with. To me they are not being straight forward.
Just a few updates......my daughters soccer game was cancelled last night because of all the rain we have had here in Texas. I think she has only played like 3 games so far this year....it has been really horrible. My oldest is slated to have a game on Thursday night but it is supposed to rain all day Wednesday so we shall see if they still have a game. I will miss their games this weekend since I will be out of town so it is definitely bittersweet.
No word from Blondy....I will reach out to her tomorrow and "check in". The other girl did respond back yesterday but I blew it with her. I asked her if she was ready for Halloween and if she had her costume picked out. Then I told her we walk around enjoying adult beverages while the kids trick or treat and its amazing. She never responded back. I guess she didn't like my Halloween comments.....man so sensitive. I guess some like to banter back and forth and others don't. I was just trying to steer the conversation away from all the mundane where are you from questions, etc. etc. etc. Oh well.......
Yep.....no expectations, easy come easy go. I just had a 33 yr old hit me up though so that makes everything a little better I seem to attract teachers for some reason......IDK what it is about me.
I seem to attract teachers for some reason......IDK what it is about me.