From the other side of the mountain (pt. 9)

[roist]

...... she is allowing small family moments to happen. Point. End the sentence there.

But good moments like that may plant the seed that you are not do bad after all!! Keep strong with no expectations

Best wishes

[Gordie]

Agree with Roist

Saying a prayer for you SBJ

[Gerda]

Wow, two nice family times in one month. That is incredible! Blessings galore. So proud of you for going with it and not having any weirdness or bitterness as you go.

I'm digging in to my vocation of being a wife by plunging into the mom side of it since the just-wife side of it is one big dark wall. This summer has really been a total surrender to my kids' needs and I must say the retreat sounds amazing, just to be your own self with God for a little bit, I sometimes forget who I am. I do pray in my church (it's always open) or in a natural place almost everyday and certainly pray all the time but it's a short break from the monotonous insanity of my home life!

Yippeeeeeeeee for SBJ!

[SBJ]

Roist and Gordie...just going with the flow. No expectations...but the time spent together is also with others (ie my kids and extended family) and is good for all. So in that sense it is nice to have everyone together and in her extended side of the family it was nice that they all got along while I was around. No bickering and arguing.

Gerda, like I told the boys, I'm just going with the flow and hoping that good times happen. As for the retreat it was an ACTS retreat and I know they are put on all over the country. Let me know where you are located and I can advise you as to who, what, where and how to find it. They are a good time for sure. They are Spirit filled for sure.

This month is a month with two dates that will be somewhat difficult. One is our 1st D anniversary and 2 days later is our wedding anniversary...which would have been 24. It's amazing how time, friends, and God can heal wounds and help you understand that none of this is of your own doing. Time is what we need to heal, but is also something that our MLCer's need to heal as well...if they choose to work on themselves. Friends help lift us up when we are down. God guides us thru the troubled waters and eases our mind if we invite him in.

Have a great weekend!!!

[DnJ]

Well said SBJ.

Time is a freind and you are most definitely healing.

Keep the faith and go with the flow.

You will make it through these difficult upcoming dates, give it time.

Stay strong and continue to be the lighthouse.

[SBJ]

Update on the short trip.

Saturday
Stayed totally upbeat the entire time. We laughed and cut up for the entire 7 hours we were together. It was fun and seemed just like old times. We had taken her SUV because my small car would have been kind of cramped, so she dropped me and the kids off and left. She had asked me to drive and gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek when I got out. That is all there is to report. Nice evening with her and 2 of our kids, plus got to hang out with several of our family friends.

Sunday
Did the church thing with the entire family and had a lunch/reception right after. Again things were very friendly between us. Sat with some friends who have ridden the crazy train with me the last 2 years. They were kind of dumbfounded as to how things are.

They saw me later in the day and the friends w, who is a therapist said she was amazed at how calm and cool I am around her. I guess I don't know either. I have gotten to the point where I don't let her bother me, because I cannot control how she is or what she does. Had some interesting emotions last night since we did spend some time together, but tried to put myself in check as to where I am in this whole process.

I pray that all of you have a wonderful week.

[Gordie]

SBJ

Sounds like you had a good time

Glad w seemed to have a good time too

You sound very even keeled a rock a lighthouse

Imagine you maybe had some emotions stirred up

But as you said you no longer revolve around her

Good for you

[Gerda]

SBJ, thank you for offering to find a retreat for me -- but you will have to take my kids for the weekend for me to do that! : ) I really have no way to leave them right now and I feel less nervous when I am with them. But I am in the Way, so I have two times per week that I am with my community, and I go to church pretty much everyday to pray (it is always open) and also to Mass. And I am just starting an outreach ministry at one of my parishes for standers!

I feel God really close to me lately. I know He is with me. But sometimes I don't want to be with Him! Fortunately, He is okay with that too, He always waits me out. : )

Thank you for the kind words and for the encouragement you provide by the way you live your life.

I don't want to put down where I live here but I wish I could meet you all for coffee right now! I'm typing this from my favorite cafe instead of doing my work.

[SBJ]

Gerda, At one point you told me about a cafe in the Houston area so I had assumed you were a fellow Texan like me, but I guess I am wrong. Any time you feel that you need to have a cup of coffee with someone, just hit me up on here, as I am most probably drinking a cup of it at any waking moment. So much so, that my friends make fun of me, saying that I always have a cup in my hand. I guess it is a crutch of mine.

I'm glad that you find time to go to your parish regularly...it is always comforting for me to know that just about any give hour, of any given day, there are people in a church somewhere around the world saying the same Mass as I am when I am there. I had my 3am adoration time in our chapel this morning, so I am a bit foggy at the moment and in need of another cup of gogo-juice.

I understand how you feel about wanting to follow or not follow Him at certain times, but that is why we surround ourselves with a community of like-minded people to lift us up when we are down or falling. I am also interested in hearing more about your standers group at your church. That sounds great. Keep me posted.

[SBJ]

Gerda, At one point you told me about a cafe in the Houston area so I had assumed you were a fellow Texan like me, but I guess I am wrong. Any time you feel that you need to have a cup of coffee with someone, just hit me up on here, as I am most probably drinking a cup of it at any waking moment. So much so, that my friends make fun of me, saying that I always have a cup in my hand. I guess it is a crutch of mine.

I'm glad that you find time to go to your parish regularly...it is always comforting for me to know that just about any give hour, of any given day, there are people in a church somewhere around the world saying the same Mass as I am when I am there. I had my 3am adoration time in our chapel this morning, so I am a bit foggy at the moment and in need of another cup of gogo-juice.

I understand how you feel about wanting to follow or not follow Him at certain times, but that is why we surround ourselves with a community of like-minded people to lift us up when we are down or falling. I am also interested in hearing more about your standers group at your church. That sounds great. Keep me posted.