I have been following you for a year and you have flipped flopped probably 10 times on wanting a D. I am pretty sure you do not want a D so I would do nothing in regards to the D process.
Continue to build a life for yourself and your children.
I have been following you for a year and you have flipped flopped probably 10 times on wanting a D. I am pretty sure you do not want a D so I would do nothing in regards to the D process.
Continue to build a life for yourself and your children.
I have been doing just that, W is asking a lot of questions lately. Like if i am going to certain social functions, I answer yes and leave it at that.
As far as flip flopping, I am on the roller coaster here just like many of us, but the difference now is I know there is life after D. Its only because of this site.
LH thank you for hitting me with 2x4's when needed. I appreciate the help and advice.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
Journaling: Today wake up normal time and W comes in bedroom and says can you give D19 a ride, I said sure no prob. W gives me the details and I drive D19. I dont know why W is asking me as D19 could have very easily said hey Dad can you drive me.
Come home from running some errands and W says I cut up some watermelon its in the fridge but its probably not cold yet. Just thought you might want some. Ok these types of interations have not happened in a while. I do not make anything of it I responded with thank you.
W then asks are you going to that fund raiser tonight? I said yes how did you know about it, she said she saw it on FB. I blocked W on FB about 4 months ago. I said yes she said have a good time, she has to work but she did not ask to come just made a point to let me know she knew. I do not want to mind read and I certainly am taking things very slow but I think she is temp checking here, not 100% sure though.
Things in our house are really feeling like normal again, as I move more and more detached I finally understand what DR is about. Of course R has not been discussed at all but it doesnt really matter at this point. There are times I really like doing things on my own or just with the kids.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
I've found that rarely does the WAS openly discuss R. I think what you are seeing is her move back towards the MR, likely because you've removed pressure and pursuit. I don't think she will go "hey, I changed my mind and now I want to reconcile!" It will happen slowly and organically.
The best thing you can do is keep DBing, and not slip back into old habits and patterns. Keep those 180s going.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Had a great time last night, all for a good cause. Great food and drinks. My parents, siblings were all there and it was a good time. Not one mention of my sitch and no one asked any questions. I did not think about my W the entire night. Came home and she asked all kinds of questions. I quickly grabbed something to snack on and went to bed.
Woke up today and W is being all friendly and nice, telling me there is food in the fridge. Her entire demeanor has changed and she is acting like herself from before BD. I do like the fact that things seem to be heading in the right direction.
I have another party tonight at the social club, its for the Belmont stakes and should be a lot of people. This place is really about building relationships and helping each other. I wish I would have joined years ago.
Just getting ready to go running and I am updating my music play list. If anyone has any good songs to work out to I am all ears.
A country lyric that really sticks out to me and makes sense is this "Dont fall in love as she walking away" I know its about when you just meet someone but I think it also applies when we get BD'ed.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
What a great weekend, party at the social club was great got home at 2am. So many laughs, life is fun again. I got chipolte today, love that place. I was pretty much home alone today and I have to tell you it was great. Got a bunch of stuff done around the house.
Monday meeting at the social club, initiating I think 8 new members, the club now has about 250 active members. Like I said before wish I had joined sooner, its never too late!
Tuesday playoff dart match, we are the top seed and we have a fairly easy first round match. capt. has been texting everyone to make sure we can all make it. Looking forward to a night out with friends.
I am going to step up my running activies this week as sometimes I take 2-3 days off and I want to be more disciplined.
Side note about the social club, there have been many questions from some of the single ladies if I am single. I will not date yet and I truly believe I should wait. Its just nice to know that there is some interest.
I am now over a year into my sitch and cannot believe how things have changed for me, so much more confident than before and everyday seems to be better.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
Tuesday night won our playoff match and looking forward to the finals next week.
This weekend D23 is coming home for Fathers day and me, D23, and D19 are running in a Fathers Day 5K. We did this several years ago and its was very fun. It is a competition and I had to sign up to compete with one D and I picked D19 who is a more experienced runner. We are not as trained as we would like to be but will do the best we can. The last time we raced we came in 15th out of 45 teams. The race generally has about 2000 runners and there is free food and carnival afterwards.
Some interesting developments with W, I just dont even try and guess what shes doing but here goes:
D19 car had to be returned as lease was up, I made an appointment for the inspection and told D19 to make sure car was home at that time. W comes to me and starts asking questions about car/return. I tell her, she then says I cleaned the entire inside of the car and scrubbed the seats of all the coffee stains D19 made in them so the car will be clean when the inspector comes. So I say ok. This is just weird, she wants to help me save money?
Then I notice the dishwasher was not drying the dishes properly, so I ask W if there is something wrong with the dishwasher. She tells me NO that she shut off the heat drying to save money on the electric. My W has never paid an electric bill or any other household bill in her life. So now she is wanting to help me?
I am really to the point of just not caring anymore. I am just not sure what else I can do. I called my L again and she is telling me that other L has gone complete silence. This is really frustrating. But W has not seen any frustration from me at all.
She was being friendly and nice the last few days and today was cold and distant. Thats fine, thats my que to step away.
M:52 W:49 D:26 S:24 S:23 D:20 ILYBNILWY 5/28/17 Still living together W filed 1/5/18 W moved out 8/24/18 D final 9/18/20
