Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 8 of 11 1 2 6 7 8 9 10 11
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
R
RR17 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
Rose your conjecture is unfounded. Perhaps you don't understand? Nor did you ask?

D15 expressed that she wanted a turtle. I surprised her with a fish. She's 15 and it didn't require an effort from W. W didn't express any dissatisfaction.
D15 never told me that she gave it away. I just discovered it. Much like I discovered my Ws A 3 years ago.

If you don't understand the rest, it doesn't appear that you care to.

I don't see where your post is kind or helpful.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
R
RR17 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
As stated earlier I have moved on from the fish story. It bothered me. Perhaps it triggered memories of betrayal.

I shared.

I didn't wage a war. I vented here.

It's over.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 879
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 879
I wasn't trying to be unkind. I was trying to help you think about why you reacted as you did to behavior from your wife and daughter that seems perfectly fine and normal and not disrespectful.

Clearly, I'm not helping, so I'll stop posting to your thread.


Me: 44
H: 44
Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10
Together/Married: 22 years
H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16
H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
R
RR17 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
You see Rose, it did seem disrespectful to me.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 18,666
Likes: 1
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 18,666
Likes: 1
Quote:
Rose your conjecture is unfounded. Perhaps you don't understand? Nor did you ask?

If you don't understand the rest, it doesn't appear that you care to.

I don't see where your post is kind or helpful.


Wow! Maybe this is an example of why you don't get more responses?


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
R
RR17 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
Originally Posted By: sandi2
Quote:
Rose your conjecture is unfounded. Perhaps you don't understand? Nor did you ask?

If you don't understand the rest, it doesn't appear that you care to.

I don't see where your post is kind or helpful.


Wow! Maybe this is an example of why you don't get more responses?






Did it seem kind or helpful to you?


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
Originally Posted By: RR17
Rose your conjecture is unfounded. Perhaps you don't understand? Nor did you ask?

D15 expressed that she wanted a turtle. I surprised her with a fish. She's 15 and it didn't require an effort from W. W didn't express any dissatisfaction.
D15 never told me that she gave it away. I just discovered it. Much like I discovered my Ws A 3 years ago.

If you don't understand the rest, it doesn't appear that you care to.

I don't see where your post is kind or helpful.


RR17, I have to say, this reaction to Rose is a little troubling.

However, related to the sitch, It seems your beef should be with your daughter. "You should have spoken to me before giving your fish away."

I think your anger towards your W is misplaced. That you want to find fault with her. Your situation is such that I think it is unrealistic for you to expect her to handle the situation the way you would expect a W in a healthy marriage to handle it.

Anyway, I think you may should just take a deep breath and realize that in 5 years this fish thing won't matter one bit. As LoneWolf said, pick your battles.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
P.S. I think the answer to the problem is found in your own statement in the post dealing with this: "But my ego told me that it was just another show of disrespect."

Hint: Starts with an 'e' and ends with an 'o'.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
R
RR17 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
R
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 816
As stated earlier I have moved on from the fish story. It bothered me. Perhaps it triggered memories of betrayal.

I shared.

I didn't wage a war. I vented here.

It's over.


M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.

Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,826
Likes: 233
Ok, so you don't want any responses related to it. Got it.

RR17, I would ask you to please use this as a self-examination opportunity. Is there anything in your behavior in these responses that could point to similar behaviors you've exhibited in the past that have contributed to your current situation?

Not looking for you to respond. Just food for thought.

Moving on, we are now 2 weeks out from the arbitrary deadline, any movement from your wife that suggests she is preparing to move out on the 18th?

Peace brother.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Page 8 of 11 1 2 6 7 8 9 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard