Any advice 4

[joejoe1]

GW,

You are talking at night and watching shows together and still eating dinner together every night? Why? Take yourself out Of these situations.
Who does the cooking? Is it you, because your W goes walking to talk to OM every night. Stop doing these things. That is your time now. Not you'll. Go away for a few days. Maybe spend the night on the lake. You are making yourself to available.

How did you know about the sex toys? Did you open the box, did your son open the box? I'm confused on how you even know. If your W opened the box, how did you know what was in it. You'll sleep in separate rooms. Seems to me you are still doing some lurking. You havent had enough yet.

You can tell us one thing GW, but your actions are speaking louder than your post.

[gw5263]

Joe joe, back in an earlier post I told how I found them. They were in the walk-in closet in a bag. I went in to get my metal detector and when I grabbed it the bag fell off of a box next to it. Yes we eat together, not always. We both cook, and only eat as a family on my nights off, two one week and three the next. Don’t jump to conclusions, I’m not hovering around. I’m out in the woods, at the lake , or at a friends most of my free time. Nights are for the kids.. we eat, talk, and watch tv.

[joejoe1]

Ok,

My fault for jumping to conclusions. Forget about those sex toys. Keep up the hard work. I didn't know her sex toys fell out the sky at you. I would of the thrown them in the trash. And if she asked why, I would of told her I don't know where that garbage came from, because I have never seen them before.

[gw5263]

Joe joe you don’t know how close I came to boxing them up and shipping them to OM with explicit instructions on what to do with them...... lol.... you and I think along the same lines I believe... your a good dude joe joe and I appreciate your input and 2x4 s when needed. I’d really like to meet up if Ky wasn’t so far away. Who knows maybe I’ll make a road trip on a short work week....

[joejoe1]

GW,

If you take a road trip to TX, I would def meet up with you. Holding had lunch a few months back and him and I text and call each all the time. When we are in tight spots we hit each other up.

It would be awesome to meet you. Just let me know, and inwould be there.

[gw5263]

Hey all,
Been away for a bit working a lot and really having a good time with friends. Ie made some really positive changes of late. I have started working on detaching pretty hard,I have are no mention of the A, the MR,or working on us. ive been working on my GAL, had the metal detector out, and caught up on a hobby I let go a long time ago, model building. Things here have been different In the last couple of weeks. I’m not reading anything into the goings on but, W has only FaceTimed OM twice, once thedayefore thanksgiving, and this past Saturday for a halfhour while I was at work. I know this because my kids told me that she hasn’t done it since. They used to tell me how long she was in the room talking with him, and I also did check the phone logs... I know, leaenit be. But I had to know. She has changed her demeanor, alternating between pleasant and very edgy and moody. She has not gone on her walks at all, which is when she would telephone him. Also,a bottle of perfume he got her has bee gone since Saturday. I haven’t smelled it at all. She texts me and asks me about the day, and laughs and try’s to joke around when I am home. She has even flirted around a little and called me a pet name she used to call me before all this began.i realize this could all be a giant temp check, or may be in response to me pulling way back and not pressing anything. It could all be nothing. But, the fact that I have been able to stop pursuit and back away is for me, something. I have really struggled with this since I got here. Now I come and go as I please, interact a lot more with my friends,, and have injected a bit of myatery into the mix. I get texts all the time from subordinates as friends at work, so I’m on the phone quite a bit when I’m home. Lately she’s been asking who I’m texting or trying to look over y shoulder... not sure what to make of any of this or if I even should. I have found that distancing has brought me a form of peace. I stopped wondering what she was doing, who she was talking to, and what she was thinking. I have tried to push the both of them out of my head and go on working on myself. The new feelings I feel are starting to make me think hard about all of this. Why did I go to such extremes to “win back someone who didn’t want me” . Why did I put myself thru so much turmoil, wracking my mind and almost going insane trying to figure it all out. All I have to do is let go, and let it be what it will. There has been no more talk of D so far.guess. I am happier now tho. As I said, I feel some semblance of peace settling in. Hoping this all works out for the best. All I can do is keep doing what I’m doing.

[joejoe1]

GW,

Great job on letting go and giving her space. Keep the GAL up. Let her wonder some more. Don't worry about the other relationship at all. You keep working on yourself. Becoming a person only a fool would leave. GW2.0 is on the move. Onward and forward.

[TBSakaJ9]

Nice work GW...it sounds like you are putting the puzzle pieces together. Continue what you are doing and don't take the bait when she starts to be nice. Be patient and stay the course.

[sandi2]

Now I come and go as I please, interact a lot more with my friends,, and have injected a bit of myatery into the mix. I get texts all the time from subordinates as friends at work, so I’m on the phone quite a bit when I’m home. Lately she’s been asking who I’m texting or trying to look over y shoulder... not sure what to make of any of this or if I even should.

There is a reason to be mysterious. Women are drawn to it........especially a wife!

Your W and the OM may have had a lover's spat. Who knows. You are doing something right, and obviously, she appears interested. Continue doing exactly what you've reported.

Great job!

[gw5263]

Just a quick question for Sandi or anyone else who may know. Is it normal for a WW to cover up when you come in the room? I went I. The MBR to get a shirt and she was changing pants and covered up like a stranger had walked in. Never mind I’ve seen her naked everyday for the last 17 years. Pissed me off for a split second then I got over it. All part of it I guess. Still has made no FaceTimes or calls like before. No long walks, nothing. Going shooting tomorrow with a good friend. First time trying a black powder muzzle loader. Looking forward to it!