Rebuilding my life #3

[lcause]

and=than... argh. This board really needs an edit button.

[joejoe1]

Lcause,

This site really does need an edit button. It use to have one, I dont understand why it was eliminated.

You W seems to be running from something. Do you think she fixed the things that caused a downfall in you'll M? Because, if not she's headed down the same road in a second one. I wonder if the parents of the OM knows she's M? Most likely not. Starting a M or R on a our is not good.

You seem to be strong and moving forward really well. Keep up the DBing.

[lcause]

Joe,

Thanks for the support. I rather think she doesn't want to be alone for the Christmas. This way they can spend time in both places.

I don't know if she even understands she had faults, even though she stated so. Being validated by someone else is just so strong feeling when the person is even close to what you could be normally attracted to.

I don't know about the details. It's only legal at this time so doubt a lot of people care about the marital status. To my knowledge they aren't engaged however I wouldn't be surprised if they soon were.

[joejoe1]

L,

Thats awesome. You sound strong buddy. Do you have big plans for the holiday?

[lcause]

Joe,

Thanks, haha. I started really wearing cologne and I gotta admit I've caught girls looking at me and even smiling back! I do think my mojo has made a comeback. I guess having sex does wonders for it.

I'm actually taking my kids to my parents at Christmas. It'll be the first time S spends a night with me. XW is still breast-feeding so S hasn't spend a night with me yet.

Thanks for checking by, Joe. I need to read and comment more on the sitches here. I wish you good luck for your piecing process. It's nice some of us do get to that phase. Don't forget what you've learned and keep growing!

[joejoe1]

LC,

Thanks for the vote of confidence.

[lcause]

So, I'm officially divorced now. I thought I would have had some sort of a feeling but I think I've processed this through too many times already to emotionally feel anything anymore - after all, I knew this would be the end result from the beginning.

2017 certainly marks a year of total change for me. So much can happen in a year. From the most beautiful thing in the world (well, end of 2016) to one of the saddest ones that can happen to a person with mere 5 months in between. Life has its ways... However life is not going to stop here. We all decide how we choose to see the situations we are forced to face - we can either grow or stay miserable. I chose to grow. Life has a lot in store for each one of us but we have to put in the work and seek for the individual next steps that, at the end, combined, do create the entire journey for us. I still do cry sometimes but not because the end of my marriage but because of not having gained the greatness I so desperately want to achieve.

Things are ok between us. We are still extremely amicable, no fights or anything at all. I don't ask or send anything, XW does contact me more - but all of it is related to kids. XW asked if I'd want to join to S's birthday party she's going to organize for her side of relatives and I politely denied. I find it odd in fact, because frankly put, I don't have any intentions of showing up in the same places anymore, especially on those occasions. You are with your next partner now - so children will have two different parties. I personally find it odd that divorced couples come together to spend e.g. Christmas but that's just me.

I'm eagerly waiting for what 2018 brings. I just keep taking the small steps, and there are so many things I want to try. My goal is to each and every day force myself to live in the moment, yet I keep reminding myself that a year from now, I can look back and say I grew. I learned. I lived.

Happy Holidays/Merry Christmas for everyone. All the best for the future

[Holding]

Thanks for the update on your sitch, LC. Just the other day I was saying to myself, "I wonder what ever happened to LC."

I'm sorry it's come to D. I know this was a hard path for you, so I'm glad the negative feelings aren't getting worse.

I hope you can find the personal growth you're looking for.

[AnotherStander]

So, I'm officially divorced now. I thought I would have had some sort of a feeling but I think I've processed this through too many times already to emotionally feel anything anymore - after all, I knew this would be the end result from the beginning.

I can relate, that's kind of what happened with me as well. I was expecting some terrible emotional response and instead it felt more like a weight had been lifted, it was more of a relief than anything else. Glad to hear you're doing well!

We all decide how we choose to see the situations we are forced to face - we can either grow or stay miserable. I chose to grow. Life has a lot in store for each one of us but we have to put in the work and seek for the individual next steps that, at the end, combined, do create the entire journey for us.

Well said!

[lcause]

Just dropping by to suggest a fragrance for men. The people in my country are generally really introverted and so far I've really never got complimented for wearing a fragrance, except by my gf/XW at the time or friends. This one I just bought and have been wearing, so far 2 girls have told me that I smell nice. One guy also told me that he really needs to know what this is. Sure it's a bit pricey, but definitely worth it. The fragrance is Creed Aventus. Compliments could also be because it's not really a mainstream fragrance, especially in my country.

XW cried last time I saw her when she had to talk about the divorce processing fees, because I want to split it 50/50. I don't understand women. Why cry over something like that? It's been over half a year already, get over it. I had zero interest in any kind of emotional support. She just doesn't mean anything to me anymore