I couldn't agree more with this. It is truly about getting that clarity for yourself, and I believe this is what creates the LBS in a position of strength.
Their decisions then aren't out of revenge, vindictiveness, clingyness, or desperation. It is out of crystal clear clarity.
This is exactly what I am trying to approach over the next year. I want to be able to let go of fears of what life has in store for me without W.
Well, you want to become a better version of yourself, so I'm not sure showing up late to exchanges is a step in the right direction.
LOL...true, I was just thinking about what a 180 for me would be since I am always punctual and hate being late.
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It seems like men often focus on the surface stuff when it comes to 180s. Gym, cologne, clothes. Those are an important step, but don't stop there.
I think I started with that because she told me I had gotten fat and wasn't physically attracted to me.
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Try out a new genre of music, take dance lessons, go see the art film you wouldn't normally see, go fishing if you're a city guy or head to the museums if you're a nature lover. Learn to cook, try a new cuisine, take an art class, shoot a gun.
I think a cooking class would be fun as I do like to cook even thought it is only formyself now. I did some research for stuff in my area and there is a place about 20 min away that offers cooking classes. There is actually 2 places. 1 is more of a BYOB, do some cooking, have some fun with adults. Like it would be a fun date night, not sure it is something that a single dude would roll to. They do offer classes for kids and parents though so that would be something fun for me and my D's
There is another place at Sur La Table that may be more appropriate. Not neccarily desgined for date night that I could check out it looks like the classes are on Saturdays for 2 to 2.5 hours.
I think trying different things is where I get hung up. I need to figure out a way to continue to get out of comfort zone. That is hard for me.
I couldn't agree more with this. It is truly about getting that clarity for yourself, and I believe this is what creates the LBS in a position of strength.
Yeah, I thought it was pretty cool. I feel like I have clarity and continue to have the emotions become less and less however I am not sure when that transfers to being ready to move on with her permanently not in your life as a S.
ok.....so I have my kids this week so I need to think of something fun to do with them after soccer on Saturday. I know it's not am individual GAL but it is GAL with my kids so does that count? I am not sure what it will be yet but I will come up with something!
For me personally taking some cooking classes sounds kinda fun. Most of them start in OCT so I will pick a date and register!
I stayed home today with my oldest....she woke up sick and I took her to the dr and she has strep throat. Usually when they get sick they want their mommy. So i texted my W and told her, I tried to handle it myself but she wanted her mommy. It didn't bother me but usually when she comes over they don't want her to leave so I thought it would be worse this time since she was sick.
My W came over to the house after school and laid in bed with my oldest until she fell asleep. TBH it was really hard to see and it made me realize how much I miss her. Seeing the tenderness of her laying with my D as she fell asleep and my W being tender brought back memories of us as a family.
I held it together in front of her but I will admit I currently have a few tears flowing.
We made a little small talk nothing major but I do miss her and I wish this didn't impact me like this. Before she left she game my youngest a hug, told her to be a good little sister and help me take care of my oldest.
Again....it was tenderness from her that I havent seen in a while. I know it had nothing to do with me and it was all about my D's but it was nice to see. After hugging our youngest she said sorry and good luck, I said thanks and off she went.
Those family dynamics are the hardest because it feels like a mirage - it's there but it's not.
Tears are good man! I feel cut up today too and I don't know why.
In terms of GAL when kids are around, I am trying to GAL with them, which usually happens on the weekends. Some stuff that I am doing consistently with them is going climbing - they're fanatics now and I also get in a few climbs when they take a break.
In my city, there are lots of things going on throughout the year usually and they have a fab tourism website. I just check it all the time and find awesome things to do. I am taking kids to a play soon; we go to some museums; take them to outdoor festivals and the beach when weather is good etc.
And one of my GAL goals is to spend quality time with them and we do outdoor and indoor stuff. We play board games, read a ton, play card games etc. And then go to the movies once in a while.
Anyways, sorry you had a down day. This is just not easy and patience is a B.
I do...I know it will get better! I am hanging as tough as I can just seeing her lay with our sick D just hit me. I think it brought back memories and for a little bit I saw a heart. Just wish it was for me......it's just so hard to imagine that her feelings could or would ever change.
