No one is ignoring that. You think she is fat and she doesn't want to date short guys anymore. I get it.
I'm looking at the bigger picture here, something that could help you in the long run.
How would you feel if she her thoughts all along have been " he's lucky I love him because other women would run from a short guy"
I am asking an honest question here. Have you always felt she was lucky you love her because she is fat and has childhood issues and no one else would want that? Because you stated that. I am asking you if you mean that or that has been the way you have felt all along.
Her bringing up me being short was her way of demeaning me. So that's actually up there with saying that I'm lucky she chose to be with a short man. I've never felt that way ever that she was lucky to have me. I was pissed at the time, said in the forum which is a safe place to vent. Prayed and then helped my W cook dinner. I'm not going to around telling my W that she lucky to have me, because nobody else wants an overweight woman. Just pointing out that there are men out who might reject her saying they don't want to deal with an overweight woman. Just like she's saying that about short men.
I bring up the A, because it is continuing at an EA level. So yes, I have been discussing ways on stopping that. As for 180s, I don't have an anger issue. But if someone says something smart to me, them respond taking it up a notch. Realizing that was my issue, through counseling I have made it a point to simply respond to my W differently and I have seen the results of that. I have been giving my W more attention and helping out more. Which she has also noticed.
The only time, I have spoken with contempt was in regards to the comment she made about me. Which also stems from several things I have found she has said about me in messages I have found. Trust me the things she has said deserves harsher words. But I have let it go for the sake of fixing the MR. I am the only in this MR taking personal accountability and I am fine with that.
But somehow you think bringing up how to deal with my the elephant in the room, which is my W EA is somehow solely focusing on the A makes no sense. Saying your surprised I'm here means that you skimmed through most of the comments and focused on one short vent session. I'll remind myself next time to keep it all to myself.
I bring up the A, because it is continuing at an EA level. So yes, I have been discussing ways on stopping that. As for 180s, I don't have an anger issue. But if someone says something smart to me, them respond taking it up a notch. Realizing that was my issue, through counseling I have made it a point to simply respond to my W differently and I have seen the results of that. I have been giving my W more attention and helping out more. Which she has also noticed. well done
The only time, I have spoken with contempt was in regards to the comment she made about me. Which also stems from several things I have found she has said about me in messages I have found. Trust me the things she has said deserves harsher words. But I have let it go for the sake of fixing the MR. I am the only in this MR taking personal accountability and I am fine with that. most LBSers have to start and end with this accountability thing for a long long time. It's valuable to know.
But somehow you think bringing up how to deal with my the elephant in the room, which is my W EA is somehow solely focusing on the A makes no sense. Saying your surprised I'm here means that you skimmed through most of the comments and focused on one short vent session. I'll remind myself next time to keep it all to myself.
really?? That's what you are taking away from this?
We cannot do anything about your w's EA/PA. She is not here trying to save the m.
We can only help you. Hence the focus on you and your choices.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
