Man that sounds like a good idea all except the OM part. One of us wouldn't be walking out. bahaha
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
All cookies are basically the same thing: butter, sugar, vanilla, flour and bits of chocolate and nuts. But why do they all taste so different?
I find the same is with heartbreak. There are so many different versions. The idea behind them all are the same, yet they each bruise the heart differently.
The bomb drop. The paperwork. The carving of your time with your own F[censored]G kids. The division of assets. The waiting for the judge to sign, a guillotine. Then when you think it's all over, you begin contemplating the reality of seeing your wife with a new partner. How much bludgeoning can your soul take.
But actually, over all, I'm doing better. Enjoying moving into my own house. Enjoying setting it up the way I want it to. Enjoying my time with my kids when they come over.
Things have been very cordial and cooperative with my ex. Down right friendly. After years of being a SAHM, she just got a full time job. She's scared, and said she loved me and missed me (but clearly was not saying she wants to get back together, in her mind this was/is inevitable because we are wrong for each other.)
Just when I feel at peace with how it all turned out, I test myself by imagining seeing my ex with someone new. Then how would I feel?
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
Just when I feel at peace with how it all turned out, I test myself by imagining seeing my ex with someone new. Then how would I feel?
Probably like crap, and that's putting it mildly. I would be lying if I said I was completely at peace with how my sitch is going, but for the most part I can think clearly and can finally see my future without my W. I then think of my W with another man and that breaks down my soul and the self doubts come crashing in. Sometimes I crazily think it would be a good thing for me because it would force me to really move on. I'm coming up on 10 months BD and if my W started seeing someone now then it's further proof a possible future M won't happen.
M 55 W 52 MR 32 T 34+ D29 BD May 8, 2016 - She moved out ILYBNILWY May 15 (Through email) No EA/PA August 23 - DB used against me in every way Divorce July 18, 2017 - Life is getting better every day
Just when I feel at peace with how it all turned out, I test myself by imagining seeing my ex with someone new. Then how would I feel?
Probably like crap, and that's putting it mildly. I would be lying if I said I was completely at peace with how my sitch is going, but for the most part I can think clearly and can finally see my future without my W. I then think of my W with another man and that breaks down my soul and the self doubts come crashing in. Sometimes I crazily think it would be a good thing for me because it would force me to really move on. I'm coming up on 10 months BD and if my W started seeing someone now then it's further proof a possible future M won't happen.
I'm sure its not healthy, but I haven't let my mind even think about that part of it. Although, i'm quite sure she's with him today as she's looking for an apartment to move into (he won't be moving in with her thankfully).
On the other side of the coin, OM's wife has had a hard time not thinking about her husband with my wife. So, while i'm intentionally not thinking about OM, his wife is struggling with thinking about the OW (my wife).
M:39 W:36 - D1:2 D2:6 11/19/16 BD1: ILYBNILWY, EA/PA Dec/Jan: MC, pursuing, not DBing 1/11/17 BD2: W wants 1 month break 2/1/17: Divorce Remedy. Start DBing 2/17/17 BD3: W - separation to start D process
To some extent, my friend. But seeing the hurt in the kids' eyes makes all other hurt pale in comparison. PALE in comparison.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
FG, I know what you mean about seeing pain in your children's eyes. At one point WH left the house and did not say when he would return. My DD6 asked when daddy was coming home and I answered that I wasn't sure. She said, "I think I need to cry now." I was gutted and simultaneously enraged that my WH could be so unbelievably selfish.
M 10yrs T 13yrs BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce April '17-Letting go 2018 D busted DD8, DS6, DS3
I know what you mean about seeing pain in your children's eyes. At one point WH left the house and did not say when he would return. My DD6 asked when daddy was coming home and I answered that I wasn't sure. She said, "I think I need to cry now." I was gutted and simultaneously enraged that my WH could be so unbelievably selfish.
Ugh. So sorry, PsySara. I'm dealing with the same thing. This weekend the kids had a meltdown and she just acted like, well, it was an inconvenience that they wanted to stay with me. Sometimes I wish I could just slap the sh*t out of her and say look at what you are doing to them.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
