Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 6 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
I
Im_Here Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
Annnnnnnd.... PA pretty well confirmed today... and still ongoing....Joy...


M 31 W 29
M 10 T 14
D S
BD 11/16 with EA/PA?
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
Originally Posted By: Im_Here
Annnnnnnd.... PA pretty well confirmed today... and still ongoing....Joy...


Same thing happened to me yesterday. I feel your pain.

Use it as motivation to further detach. Let go. Move forward with your life without her. And however you found out that the PA is ongoing, don't look there again (but save the info for your L).


M:39 W:36 - D1:2 D2:6
11/19/16 BD1: ILYBNILWY, EA/PA
Dec/Jan: MC, pursuing, not DBing
1/11/17 BD2: W wants 1 month break
2/1/17: Divorce Remedy. Start DBing
2/17/17 BD3: W - separation to start D process
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 2,937
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 2,937
Quote:
Use it as motivation to further detach. Let go. Move forward with your life without her. And however you found out that the PA is ongoing, don't look there again (but save the info for your L).


Well said, sir. He does need to get everything he can - email/text/photo - for the lawyer.


There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 203
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 203
Ugh, so hard dealing with an A and to know it is still going on. I hated the emotional rollercoaster that shock wave took me on. Sorry my friend, but KevinIn is correct when saying to use this info to help detach.

Unfortunately, where I live, my state is now a "no fault" state meaning no matter how much evidence I have of her A I will not be able to present it before a judge in my case. If it will help you during your proceedings then by all means use it, but if not then I'm not sure you would want to hang onto all that hurtful evidence?


M: 37 W: 36
T: 16 M: 11
D2: 8,3
PA: 2015
WAW: 2016
W Filed: 2017
2/07/2017 W officially dating OM2
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 2,937
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 2,937
Quote:
Ugh, so hard dealing with an A and to know it is still going on. I hated the emotional rollercoaster that shock wave took me on. Sorry my friend, but KevinIn is correct when saying to use this info to help detach.


Yes it is, sir. I suspected it and in the midst of snooping found more disturbing stuff than I care to admit. Ugh. And when the OM's ex-W sent me all of it, that was the icing. That roller coaster was, well, sucktastic.

Quote:
Unfortunately, where I live, my state is now a "no fault" state meaning no matter how much evidence I have of her A I will not be able to present it before a judge in my case. If it will help you during your proceedings then by all means use it, but if not then I'm not sure you would want to hang onto all that hurtful evidence?


I am also in a no-fault state. But it was useful...in more ways than one. Keep the info until all is said and done.


There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
Originally Posted By: Jeep74
sucktastic.


I just got a new favorite word to describe my life lately. once again, Jeep has been helpful to my life.


M:39 W:36 - D1:2 D2:6
11/19/16 BD1: ILYBNILWY, EA/PA
Dec/Jan: MC, pursuing, not DBing
1/11/17 BD2: W wants 1 month break
2/1/17: Divorce Remedy. Start DBing
2/17/17 BD3: W - separation to start D process
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
I
Im_Here Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
No fault state here as well.. mainly just that confirmation for myself.. and a piece if I needed to confirm to any else.. which really doesn't matter as those that i know cared already saw what was going on before and had concern.. The ones that she surrounds herself with now are ok with the A happening and the Sep and D.. because they have all been D themselves! ugh...

I keep chugging along with my kiddos.. they keep me heading on the right path to bettering myself and keep me leveled on this plane.. without them I don't know where I would be. The problem is I cannot go full NC though as conversations happen about them with the STBXW...I still am not fond of that acronym.. Everytime we talk even if its about the kids brings up memories and feels just like we are still together.. it [censored] as I know I can't trust her words..

Had a Bday over the weekend as well and spent time with friends and family which was nice, they made a big deal out of it but its just another day to me.. she never directly said Happy Bday to me.. although at the end of the night she asked if her and the kids could bring by a gift from them in the morning and it sounded like she sang happy bday with them over the phone which was nice.. but again, words not actions... smirk

My mind was racing this morning with thoughts of things I wished I could say to her, things that before would mean something, or so I thought would mean something.. I try to remain strong, its the weeks I don't have the kids with me that I slip as they usually keep me busy enough to not think about it..


M 31 W 29
M 10 T 14
D S
BD 11/16 with EA/PA?
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
I
Im_Here Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 33
Another thing to add also, is the worst part in all this and I know I have read it numerous times before.. is the feeling of losing your best friend. You have pictures or stuff that you want to tell someone that you would have told her before without a thought.. and now you have no one to share it with..

Like I had a funny picture of our kids or something else that normally I would share with her and now I don't have anyone to share it with..


M 31 W 29
M 10 T 14
D S
BD 11/16 with EA/PA?
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 289
Originally Posted By: Im_Here
Another thing to add also, is the worst part in all this and I know I have read it numerous times before.. is the feeling of losing your best friend. You have pictures or stuff that you want to tell someone that you would have told her before without a thought.. and now you have no one to share it with..

Like I had a funny picture of our kids or something else that normally I would share with her and now I don't have anyone to share it with..


I feel your pain on this one. I truly do. No one to share anything with.


M:39 W:36 - D1:2 D2:6
11/19/16 BD1: ILYBNILWY, EA/PA
Dec/Jan: MC, pursuing, not DBing
1/11/17 BD2: W wants 1 month break
2/1/17: Divorce Remedy. Start DBing
2/17/17 BD3: W - separation to start D process
Page 6 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard