WAW and the big D

[Dawgs]

She's not on your team right now. Therefore, she can't be trusted.

Very true. She isn't on his team. But I'd let her - and anyone else - know that if anything even remotely happens to them that hell would coming with me.

I told the ex and the OM that if he ever set foot around my kids, I'd break his legs.

[Bdog37]

This may play greatly into your favor concerning custody issues, too. Her being involved with someone like that - and worse, bringing your daughters around him/them - would not be looked at too favorably in the courts. They tend to frown on that...

I would do it ASAP.

I would actually love that! Right now it is shared custody, but if the background check does come out to be 2 violent crimes then this is something I will bring up in court. I called my lawyer, but he is in court right now so just waiting for him to respond. I just still can't believe that she doesn't bother finding out who this guy is before hand. Maybe the "bad boy" image is whats so appealing in the first place?? However, my children do not need to be exposed to any sort of violence! I grew up that way and in no way want my children experiencing that at all!

[Cristy]

I agree with Jeep. Please contact your lawyer to protect your children. I wouldn't suggest telling your W that you know who she is dating or your plan on taking legal action. She's not on your team right now. Therefore, she can't be trusted.

Hi SAL27,

Yes, contact your lawyer about the possible restraining order against OM. This could also play into your custody arrangement.

I agree with LITB regarding not saying anything to your wife about it right now. No need to even tell her that you know who OM is along with his background. Based on her current state, she could take their relationship further underground rather than recognizing that it is a safety issue. She is also likely to do the opposite of what you say regarding not wanting the children around OM.

You need to proceed very cautiously. Knowing what to do and what not to do at this point is crucial. Feel free to give me a call at 303-444-7004 to discuss how we can best help you determine what to do next.

Cristy

Resource Coordinator
The Divorce Busting Center
303-444-7004

[Dawgs]

I would actually love that! Right now it is shared custody, but if the background check does come out to be 2 violent crimes then this is something I will bring up in court. I called my lawyer, but he is in court right now so just waiting for him to respond. I just still can't believe that she doesn't bother finding out who this guy is before hand. Maybe the "bad boy" image is whats so appealing in the first place?? However, my children do not need to be exposed to any sort of violence! I grew up that way and in no way want my children experiencing that at all!

I fully imagine she knows. The OM in my case was a bad boy too - as were all the ones who beat her. I'd be much more worried about more than just violence, sir.

[Bdog37]

Well I know that he is into drugs. I know this because of the mutual friends we have. The person who is filling me in on all this does not like the guy, but sees him at family gatherings once in awhile. Says that he is into drugs and believes that was one of the reasons he was arrested. Since he doesn't really talk to the OM, he doesn't know about the other time he was arrested. Wow, how can women be so naïve?? Maybe she has gone so far off the deep end that she is now into drugs??

[Bdog37]

I will not say anything to her tonight. I'm only going to be with her for a few hours so I will keep any conversation about the kids and politely say my goodbyes. Its going to be hard biting my tongue, but I know there will be no good coming if I bring it up. I'm pretty sure it will just start an argument so....

[LITB]

I will not say anything to her tonight. I'm only going to be with her for a few hours so I will keep any conversation about the kids and politely say my goodbyes. Its going to be hard biting my tongue, but I know there will be no good coming if I bring it up. I'm pretty sure it will just start an argument so....

Yes, do everything within your power to bite your tongue. It will serve you well when you drop the hammer from a legal standpoint. More importantly, you are doing it for your children and you have to respect a man who will protect his family.

Remember, she is on the opposite team at the moment. Don't let her in on your game plan.

[Bdog37]

Yes, do everything within your power to bite your tongue. It will serve you well when you drop the hammer from a legal standpoint. More importantly, you are doing it for your children and you have to respect a man who will protect his family.

Remember, she is on the opposite team at the moment. Don't let her in on your game plan.

Yes, I totally agree. This still just all saddens me as she used to be someone I could proudly say was my wife. Now, she has turned into something so much more. Not in particular worried about her, but the children are my life and I was already worried about having another man help raise my family. It is something that I can't get over, but I would understand if he was a nice family man who treated my kids well and respected my wishes. I do not believe anyone with such a family history and criminal background would.

[Dawgs]

I will not say anything to her tonight. I'm only going to be with her for a few hours so I will keep any conversation about the kids and politely say my goodbyes. Its going to be hard biting my tongue, but I know there will be no good coming if I bring it up. I'm pretty sure it will just start an argument so....

Whether you start and argument or not is irrelevant. Your kids are more important than hurt feelings.

[LITB]

How did it go last night SAL?