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#2466441 - 07/06/14 06:08 PM CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on....
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2458291#Post2458291

This is my thread from newcomers as my D will be finalized this week.
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2466443 - 07/06/14 06:48 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
I guess I looking for help or support on continuing to DB as I have one more MC session which I am thinking will be a closure session rather than a restart for me and my STBXH. He had said in our last MC that he wants me but can't deal with my sisters and my kids. He is also dealing with the hurt I caused him and how I didn't make an effort with his kids. I ended up crying which always upsets him and is not what I should be showing him. He also wants to continue to see each other and it be just between us no one else. He mentioned that he is trying to get to the gray area as he only sees things in black and white and deals with absolutes. I admitted that I didn't see a future for us a my STBXH only deals with absolutes. After that session, my STBXH has not initiated contact like he previously had. My STBXH also said that when I ask for reassurance it scares him and he backs off. I know that I didn't give to my STBXH nor make the effort with his kids and family which I wish I had seen my mistakes so much sooner. I'd appreciate some thoughts. Thank you
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2466480 - 07/07/14 12:40 AM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
I do intend on learning from this situation and my part in it. I want to be a better person overall. Not sure if anyone has any advice but it's definitely welcome
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2466901 - 07/08/14 03:34 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
Well I am going dark and doing LRT as I think this is the way to proceed. My STBXH has not initiated contact since our MC session last Wednesday. We are scheduled for a session tomorrow to wrap up and get closure (?) I don't know if he will show up but if he doesn't then I will have to deal with it then. Really struggling with letting go of hope for a R. Guess I just have to put one foot in front of the other
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2466914 - 07/08/14 03:57 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
My STBXH has cancelled the session for tomorrow as he has a doctor appointment and doesn't want to take any time away from his kids who are here for the next 3 weeks before they leave back to PA. It hurts but I can understand. I just need to keep living and take care of myself and my kids.
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2467069 - 07/08/14 10:53 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
He texted me about moving the rest of my furniture out. He offered to find a truck to help...guess he wants it all gone asap. Another hard day for me. I did text him that I wished him well and I hoped things remain civil.
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2717982 - 11/27/16 06:49 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
CS000 Offline
Member

Registered: 04/03/14
Posts: 223
It's been over 2 years since I've posted. In that time I lost my mom to cancer and have going through a few challenging times plus a new job.
I have started seeing my 2nd XH. He initiated contact and wants to get back together. I am wary....I need to continue to work on myself along with putting my kids first. If we ever got back together seriously, we would need to go to counseling and go very slow.
_________________________
Me 34
M 2.5 (Both 2nd M)
My kids-D 17,S 16,S 12
BD 2/14
D final 7/2014

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#2720686 - 12/12/16 04:58 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: CS000]
Esame Offline
Member

Registered: 04/11/16
Posts: 461
I'm so sorry about your mum.

Do you want to get back with your XH? I would start from there and then continue with piecing very slowly
_________________________
"There's nothing sadder than a conman conning himself"

“There is freedom waiting for you,
On the breezes of the sky,
And you ask "What if I fall?"
Oh but my darling,
What if you fly?”

-Erin Hanson






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#2720920 - 12/13/16 11:56 PM Re: CSan - Filed, moving and life goes on.... [Re: Esame]
Pax_luv Offline
Member

Registered: 10/12/15
Posts: 450
I'm sorry about your mom. I'm sure that was a challenging thing to go through.

Very interesting about seeing your xh. I don't know your timeline or what happened, but as you know, piecing is a lot of work. What sort of things would you do differently this time around? You've got the right idea about putting the kids first and continuing to work on yourself.
_________________________
Me- 30's H- 40's
T-10 M-5
I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15
D filed by H: September 16

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