The Winner Takes it All

[RosaLinda]

Sorry Job, I finally noticed your note that my thread was WAY over due, sorry!

I was trying to think what to call this, and remembered how I used to name my threads after whichever song fit my brokenhearted, angry, hopeful, resigned or grateful state of mind at the time. After considering just plain "Happy" (but was never sure what he meant by clapping along if you feel like a room without a roof LOL) and also "If you want to be happy" by Jimmy Soul (If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife) I decided to pick this ABBA song, "The winner takes it all."

I remember torturing myself moping around the house listening to ABBA and crying about my ex and his OW. But have come to realize that WE are the winners. We honored our vows, stood strong with dignity and did everything we could to save our marriages. We came out the other side much better men and women, stronger. We faced the crappy stuff about ourselves and are trying our best to do better and be better. Maybe not totally whole yet, but healing. And very very important for those of us with kids - we showed our children what it means to honor and fight for your marriage.

I don't know how I could have ever thought that any OP could be the winner. A relationship based on lies and cheating is not worth having. We are moving on, leaving them to their broken relationships based on smoke and mirrors.

So this is dedicated to all of us, but especially you, Grl On Fire AKA JksD. I know you are hurting honey, but you are and will always be the winner, standing strong and taking it all. TPT may have your ex, but she is actually the loser, standing small. Stand tall Jks.

I don't want to talk
About the things we've gone through
Though it's hurting me
Now it's history
I've played all my cards
And that's what you've done too
Nothing more to say
No more ace to play

The winner takes it all
The loser standing small
Beside the victory
That's her destiny

Old Thread: Divorced and so grateful

[job]

RosaLinda,

You have said it all perfectly. The winner absolutely takes it all.

We all come here and to other forums crying the blues about our spouses leaving and then discovering they are w/new partners. But, it takes time to realize that a house built on sand (lies and cheating), can't weather the storms of time. Eventually cracks will appear and the structure begins to crumble. They may attempt to patch the cracks, but let's face it, the trust in each other is not there....how can it be? Especially when they both know that they cheated on their former partners/spouses.

So, let's all raise our glasses and cheer each other on. Yes, ABBA's song lyrics say it all...the winner takes it all and we are the winners...some of us just don't know it yet...but time will reveal all to those who sit quietly and wait for the answers to be revealed.

[Ginger1]

Love, love, love it!

You nailed it, we can all stand tall. I'd rather be able to do that than get what I want by hurting others.

Now in addition, "We are the champions" is replaying in my head....

[Rouky]

OMG what a brilliant post. I love and needed it. Thank you RosaLinda x

[RosaLinda]

aw thanks. I was in a sort of sappy philosophical mood

I was so excited, my sister sent our sister-in-law and I tickets to fly in for a quick visit to her summer home on Tybee Island, GA, to celebrate our birthdays (which are one day and MANY years apart, Libras rock) this coming weekend. They are holding a pirate parade and I've been practicing my argggs and rum consumption skills.

But it looks like Hurricane Matthew might join the party. I guess I'll know if it is going to hit or not before my flight on Thursday, but the thought is really scaring me.

I live on the coast of Long Island, but on the north shore, 60 miles above sea level, so we don't get storm surges here. But we do see wind and rain damage. I remember Hurricane Gloria back in 1985, just after S31 was born. It was just a category 2 when it hit, but the devastation was awful. And Sandy was just category 1, but destroyed so many homes and businesses here. I'm sort of nervous about being on a 1 x 3.5 mile barrier island with a category 4 barreling up the coast. Ugh.

[job]

RL,

You may want to check out the weather forecast. Looks like it's going to hit close to there around Thursday and we, in Maryland, will be getting rain (again) Saturday and Sunday from dear ole Matthew.

I do hope that you get to go and enjoy yourself...but be prepared for the uninvited guest of Matthew.

[Ginger1]

Oh, I know how much you love it down there, what an exciting surprise! I'm going to try to do the anti-hurricane dance so you can go and have a blast!

[JksD]

I just had to listen to the song on youtube. And some of the (rather inappropriate) comments did provide a giggle.

Thanks, RL, for being a rock for me.

[uRworthy]

Rosa, you freakin rock. Love you, my friend. So happy that you are getting to go to Georgia. I am joining my girl Ginger in the anti hurricane dance.

[RosaLinda]

Ugh ugh ugh. I have not been on here in weeks, but figured since I was here for Jack3Beans' tribute, I'd check in on my thread and check up on some friends. And noticed Jksd's note about giggling over the inappropriate comments on "The Winner Takes It All" on youtube. So naturally I had to go read them too.

I was SO friggin upset to learn that song was written by the lead singer Agnetha's ex husband, and that it was released AFTER they broke up. How heart breaking. He sounds like a typical MLC a$$hole, writing how the winner (his new GF) takes it all. I hope to God that Agnetha took the song to mean what we do, that we, the DBers formerly known as LBS, á la Prince, are the winners, and the OP and the cheater are the losers. That woman sure could have used some DBing. I hope she's well and happy without the cad grrrr.

Well my Georgia birthday weekend was called on account of rain. And wind. And tidal surges. My baby sister turns 60 next June, and says she'd like us to use the tickets then, as a birthday bash for herself LOL. I'm not sure my fella will want to go, as he is NOT fond of heat and humidity. Sort of puts a nix on moving down there, sigh LOL

What's up with you all? I have good news - I have been working three night shifts in the ER every 2-week pay period since graduating from lawschool in 2005, and just changed this week to semi-days, 10am to 10pm, instead of 8pm to 8am. Except that yesterday was my first shift, and I did not get out of there until 1230am LOL. But getting home at 1 am was better than getting home at 9 am! I'm grateful!

The trees are really getting gorgeous here now. Job, I was so surprised that yours trees were starting to turn when we drove down to North Carolina a month ago. I love this time of year. We're going to a winery with Ginger in 2 weeks, the place is fabulous and also has an apple orchard. They charge you an arm and leg to do all the picking work yourself, but the apples are fresh and delicious!

I'd love to have you all over for a cup of coffee and some homemade apple pie and ice cream! Wouldn't that be fun!!