Clearte sometime friends want to see you happy and not get taken advantage of so that is probably why they say the doormat comment. Listen to people on here since we are all here for they same reason
W:42 M:48 T:9 yrs M:1yr BD: Feb 2016 EA Confirmed: Feb 2016/PA July 2016 D: Feb 2017
I've read your entire thread. And I'm very sorry both of your are here. I'm just starting down this path with my W as well. I will be following your posts
W:32 M:26 T:5 yrs M: 3 yr BD: JUN 2016 W Moved out: early JUL 2016 W Filed for D: mid JUL 2016 EA: 06/16? PA: 07/16 Moved in w/ ow: 07/16 D final: 10/16
A doormat is taken advantage of. A nice person does what she can do to help, on her own terms, and only as much as she wants to. And she probably doesn't do much while there is an AP.
Hawk, IDK what you should do, but I think it's important that W knows you know, and that she knows it's NOT OK with you. And by that I mean you can't ask her not to go on this trip with ow, or whatever it is, but you can say, you know what? As long as you're seeing her, I'm no longer interested in hearing about your day or what's up with you or if you are having a bad day. You're not there when I'm having a bad day, and in fact your A is causing my bad days. So I need some time alone right now to figure out what I want MY future to look like. I've got some choices I need to make. Let's dome up with a strategy, ok? I'm not quite sure yet if this is the best strategy for you, but I'm thinking this is the direction you want to take. Otherwise, it sounds like you're just waiting in the wings and she knows it.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
HAHAHAHA yes, I have to tell myself over and over in my head...you left, you cheated, you are still gone so.....