"Ginger, You can't make anyone change, but you can change the way that you react to them. When they disrespect you, speak up and let them know it's not okay to talk to you that way. I know, it's like beating a horse to death and then thinking the horse will get up and trot away...but you have to take a stand for YOU and for your daughter.
Ginger, you are doing everything humanly possible to support your daughter and she should not be afraid to express her thoughts/feelings to her father. It's such a shame. However, I am very glad she can talk to you and some of her other relatives.
Your xh is a fool and yes, an @sshole too.
I wish that I could do something to make both you and your daughter feel better."
Job, thank you. Luckily, my daughter is a happy girl. I know she hurts whens he hears her dad do stupid things, but she is otherwise happy. I'm just always there supporting her, checking in, making sure everything is ok. Thankfully, we have a good support system, friends, ect. I do tell him he needs to watch what he says and how he says it around our daughter, but he basically ignores me. But I do speak up. I am not scared of him anymore like I used to be.
As for me, I'm trying to do what my IC says. Reminding myself that I am deserving of good things, not bad. It's a shame I let the way people treat me or reject me make me think otherwise. I've got to stop that crap.
Ginger, I am glad that you are speaking up to your xh when he says or does something in front of your daughter. I hope and pray that he will one day realize that he's a lucky man to have a daughter who is beautiful kind, compassionate and caring of others. He walked away from a good family, a family that many would go the extra mile to have. What a fool!
I am also happy that you have people in your life that make you feel loved and deserving. Never allow someone to bring you down. You've worked hard and deserve all of the best that life has to offer. You truly are a remarkable lady...never forget that.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Job, your words mean so much to me, and make me smile and tear at the same time! You've been quite a lifesaver to so many people here, and it is very valued.
I saw this quote on Fb just not. It is my life right now:
"...but you've always been good enough, you've just been giving the best parts of you to the wrong people."
The quote is absolutely perfect and it is the truth. Time to take care of you...number one!
Enjoy your weekend.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I had a nice weekend celebrating the step moms 50th ( I drank my weight in margaritas) then I BBQ'd for my dad for fathers day. I love cooking for adults:) .
I dropped D8 off with him from another party before I went to mine and I mentioned I was looking forward to the margaritas and he says in front of his wife and sister " make sure you drink water between drinks so you aren't hungover in the morning". Yeah, thanks for the advice.
My depression kind of continues, but I mask it well. I function. I have fun when I'm doing something fun. I exercise. I socialize. But things really stink when I go to bed and wake up in the morning. For so long I had hope that kept me going. I'm losing it, and it's a very scary thing.
I heard more about exNG again, and it sent me on a mental spin. I'm going to put an end to it. I should be over this by now, but it's completely setting me back. it's torture. I've developed a complex I rationally know is insane for hearing all of this. The cycle of guys letting me go when I express a need, go to the next woman right away or beforehand and stay long term with them, and give them what I needed. Seriously coincidental, but nonetheless, crazy making. I think each time I wish one would come to me and admit they make a mistake. Never has happened, of course.
Still not changing anything about myself to make guys chose me. I'm a great choice long term, just as I am. Too good, I think I scare them away 😝
To be fair to my source of informatioN, I put up such a good front making him think it doesn't upset me. And I say things that bring the info deeper. It's totally on me. I'm going to be honest about it, though.
Shockingly enough, I have a very hard exterior. People typically see a tough strong "f*ck it" kind of chick. But I'm really a big mush.
I wonder if you can put an expiry date on heartbreaks.
I get what you're going through. To the outside world, you're doing tough as nails fine. But you're not and you just wish that someone can see through your pretense.
Yes, it totally svcks that what the xes were unwilling to give us, they seem to be willing to give to other women.
Could you tell your friends not to mention anything about ex NG to you? Perhaps a total NC will be good for the time being.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
