2016 a New Year - getting out of my own fog

[Irish M]

Try not to feel sad for very long at your ex's choices. Hope that she gets herself better and you can make different choices if that happens. It will be a long time if it happens, so don't miss out on the present feeling sad for very long. It's ok to enjoy the gifts and people you have right now instead.

Hey AJ
you are 100% right. I need to work on this though. I feel like its my last hurdle to my own finish line. Seeing the pain my D's have and when they bring up STBXW its surrounded by negative comments by them. I have to remind them constantly that she was a good mom and she is going through her own issue that is her own.

I think I’m in a better place right now. This is such a great feeling to me, to be able to look back and realize that we did have a good life together.

Hi Bright :-)

So glad you see this too. You did have a good life. He will see it too one day, I hope. What he does with it when that happens is all up to him. You also have choices. Use that reminder of what you had to remind yourself that you are great and loving. You are worth any mans love. The question is , is he worth yours?
(((hugs)))

It sounds as though you have accepted D will happen (D is just around the corner in my sitch.) I think some sitches really have to go all the way and who knows if or when someone's spouse may begin to wake up and smell the coffee? I figure that could well happen for any of us at some point - but there is plenty of living to be done in the meantime, and it sounds as though you are doing just that.

Hi Sotto :-)

yes its what they want the most. To have that freedom and to solve their pain and anguish. I am sorry you are going through this but its happening. Who knows before the final signature happens they might wake up. Is it all going to magically repair what they did? I don't think so. This is why I chose my life from now on. The one with my STBXW is gone. It needs to end 100% and that is divorce. The future relationship I have will be what I want with a partner that feels and shares our dreams. Respects my D's and shares her feelings. I might prepare a questioner to steer away from potential MLC'r. I am not doing this again.lol

-------------------------------------

So no response from STBXW on my letter to her lawyer on her relationship with our Daughters that I sent 2 weeks ago. Also no response to my counter offer on her divorce requests either. I pretty much closed the door on all her requests and backed them up with emails, texts and financial records. My Lawyer was impressed and wondered why I needed him.

As you know I'm Irish. lol

I had one of the best Saint-Patrick days (week) celebrations in a long long time. Lots of activities this weekend with my girls. A second parade and some family diners. I so wish they would have continued Irish dancing. They quit a few years back due to the competitiveness. Some of the other parents were worse than hockey or baseball dads that put so much pressure on the kids to win. I loved that they enjoyed it, winning or not.

i leave you with an Irish prayer

MAY GOD GIVE YOU...
FOR EVERY STORM, A RAINBOW,
FOR EVERY TEAR, A SMILE,
FOR EVERY CARE, A PROMISE,
AND A BLESSING IN EACH TRIAL.
FOR EVERY PROBLEM LIFE SENDS,
A FAITHFUL FRIEND TO SHARE,
FOR EVERY SIGH, A SWEET SONG,
AND AN ANSWER FOR EACH PRAYER.


Irish

[ciluzen]

The Irish prayer is lovely, IM. My grandfathers and one grandmother were Irish. My H still loved my "Irish eyes" last year (or so he said last anniversary...on St Patrick's Day!). I'm glad you got to celebrate with loved one's all week. That must have been wonderful!

[123Gwen]

Irish - A beautiful prayer. I definitely needed to read that today. Thanks for posting. I am so glad you had fun with your family and friends. Life is in the details and best enjoyed in the present. So glad you are enjoying this time with your girls.

[job]

I second what Gwen posted. The Irish Prayer is beautiful and it does lift you up in many ways. I, too, am glad that you had fun w/your family and friends. Spend all the time you have available w/your girls for they grow up so fast. The memories that you make w/them will last a lifetime.

BTW, it's time to start a new thread.

[Irish M]

Here is my new thread.


Finding myself and leaving my wife to her MLC