Ghostbusting Round 5 Detaching my feelings

[ATPeace]

Resist the urge to show your W anything, because frankly G, you have nothing to show her at this time. I am not trying to belittle you, I am only speaking from experience. Your core foundation has been shaken with a category 10 earthquake and desolation reigns... Your heart has been ripped from your chest and trampled upon by a heard of wilder beasts, everything you have to know as a truth has came crashing down in a flame of destruction. I'm betting you do not even know who you are at this moment. THAT IS NORMAL, WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE, but now is the time to get your a$$ in gear and move. You have been destroyed, so start building a new you, a better you. YOU HAVE TO BUILD A NEW YOU FOR YOU, AND NOT FOR YOUR DAMN WIFE. In a little while you will find yourself filled with anger and even hate for your wife, again, that is normal.

Now, GROW, GROW for you. Work on yourself, let go of your wife, there is a good chance the situation is FUBAR anyway. And another thing, you are mistaking love for codependency.

You deserve to be loved and loved right and you should not settle for abuse and disrespect. BUT, YOU HAVE TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. And you G, you do not have an ounce of love for yourself.

So make a break with the past. Let the old G die, bury him, mourn him if you must, do not worry about your marriage (BECAUSE YOU HAVE NONE ATM) and build Ghost 2.0, new you, better you, a Ghost that will be happy just being Ghost and not some needy, clingy, codependent, sniffling G 1.0.

I love you G, I really do, bit you piss me off like no one. So, I do not want to read another line from you where you say you will try, or how you always manage to find excuses so you do not have to move forward. I will help you along, nudge you if I must, but if I read more excuses from you, I will lovingly let go and discontinue with your thread.

Stay strong G...

Vapo

Thank you for your honest frank talk I am trying t detach my feelings from my wife I have joined a gym and taken up a personial trainer I have been over weight all my life and now is the time for me to do something about this yet I still find that I eat the wrong things ....even tho I have had 11 sessions with a personal trainer I have not lost much weight and I know this takes time...I am still not doing this 100% you and others have said I have not changed and your right I want to change need to change

Today I am meeting with a diffentent trainer who hopefully will be able to give me some nutrition advice as well

So vapo

I have been to some meet up sessions do not feel comfy able but I will continue I am going to one tonight
I have started back up my tennis something I love
I have joined a gym
I have been more active going for walks
I will look at what I am eating
I am building up my business ..I love my job
I want to be fitter and more healthy
I spend more quality time with my children

Vapo what else can I do to work on myself to detach from my W and my past life

Thank you I will do this....small steps I will do this tho

Ghost x

[sandi2]

You need to be involved in something that connects you with people. Have you ever volunteered in some type of project to help others?

Do you enjoy going to sport events, concerts, comedy shows,etc.?

Do you live in a city or rural area?

[ATPeace]

I live outside a city so lots to do in the area

I have never volunteered I do not know when I would get the time to do this I work days and w works evenings

I am looking at controlling what I can control

I do,like concerts sporting events and comedy not really been to many over the years

Time,for a new thread

May the next one keep me being more positive about me and what I can do for me

I feel I am making a little progress it is not big and I still feel too attached but I am not waking in panic and fear I sleep,better I do,not cry all the time

Thank you

Ghost

[ATPeace]

New thread
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2651942&#Post2651942