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123mich Offline OP
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WW also shared a few weeks ago she stopped taking her antidepressant med. The story on that is 2 years ago, I reached out to her primary care physician asking the doctor to reach out to her (because of patient privacy it was a challenge) and ask for psych evaluation to get her antidepressant med (thinking she was depressed due to abortion).. now knowing that the abortion was the turning event for her (and us).


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It's been a few days since I posted. Last week, while I was walking my dog late at night I get a text from WW. She got someone to watch the dog so she can join me and kids on road trip (which I was planning to leave early the next morning). I wanted to say, NO because she already told me she would not be going (and I assumed she had plans for New Year (eve)) but.. I had to hold back and say ok for my kids.. I know my kids really want their mom to join us.

Long story short she joined us for road trip. I have to give myself thumbs up for staying in control of myself. I need to continue on this path of DB'ing (letting go and working on myself).


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Nice job, 123mich!

How are you going to keep your emotions in check on the road trip?

Chad


M46, EXWW46
M15 T17
D20, S19, D13
M - Addiction since 1998
W EA/PA #1 2013/2014
W EA #2 June 2015...
BD 1 Big D talk 9/15
BD 2 - EA/PA disc 10/30/15
Served D 1/22/16
Divorced 5/25/16 (yes, that fast!)
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123mich Offline OP
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Trumpet, during the road trip I kept my emotions in check by telling myself that I didn't deserve to be treated like sh!t and that I am here for my kids (family trips are something I never had as a child so building memories for my kids is important to me).


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123mich Offline OP
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Long story short, I called my brother today and told him I could not have our mom stay with me if she was flying in to visit. He asked why and I replied I was having MR problems (no details shared). He is the 1st relative I told. He replied that I can always call to talk to him about it but honestly I don't need to talk I just need action (DB for myself and my kids).


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I've been looking through the MLC threads this morning, looking for inspiration and guidance. I found this little gem, and I'm going around sharing it with everyone I think it may be helpful to. Sometimes everything just gets to be too much, and I forget where I'm supposed to be focusing. It really helped me redefine where I want to go, and how I'm going to get there. I hope it helps you a bit, too.

Originally Posted By: ericmsant2


Consider the DB basic principals....

1) Healthy boundaries.
2) Better communication
3) GAL
4) "act as if"
5) Change how you look at things
6) Keep a positive outlook
7) Personal growth
8) Learning more about you so that you can be all that you can be.
9) Learning to avoid "cheese less tunnels"
10) Love and respect

These principals can be used in all facets of ones life. When used properly....they truly can change you from the INSIDE OUT.


Me: 48 H: 50 - Married 21 - 3-S: 29,19,19 2-D: 27,26
BD: 08/2015 - D filed & OW disc: 09/2015

"Surrender to What Is, Let Go of What Was, Have Faith in What Will Be." -S Ricotti
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123mich Offline OP
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Ancaire, thank you for sharing. It is a very nice sweet and simple list to remind ourselves of where we should focus our energy and time. I like it.


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123mich Offline OP
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I am doing well keeping my cool. Not bringing up MR or OM.. none of it but I internally am dying.. Working to stay strong for my kids and myself.


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Tonight, I made a comment about someone winning mutli-state lotto.. over 1b. W replies, "it's to bad you didn't win then you could buy your own house; we both would be happy". I didn't say anything but left the room a short time after to walk the dog, cold and raining outside but better than being in same room with WW.


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123mich Offline OP
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I am truly accepting the fact that I cannot change WW and that I need to work on myself; DB. This is difficult especially for someone like me, self diagnosed, having some form of OCD (fixated on WW and OM).. but I am working on it for me and my kids.. life is too short.


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