Hello all I am here to celebrate having survived Christmas Day and I am still standing and breathing. Who ever dreamed that the celebration of the birth of a redeemer for all of humanity could be so painful? Just when I thought that I was on solid footing I suffer one of the worst days yet. For a day I was right back to the helpless feelings and the feeling that time is standing still.
It helped a little that S13 seemed OK with everything. He and I took a long drive and were able to talk about some things and it seemed to go well. I am stronger now and I intend to be a better father and told him so. I know that he needs for me to be strong and thanks to my counselor, my meds and all of my friends here I will be able to.
It helped too that a couple of cute girls texted pictures of themselves to me. I asked my son how he would feel if I went on a date with a girl and he didn't respond. He doesn't know that his mother is dating. I'll not be the one to tell him.
More family coming this afternoon and it is going to be fun. No presents just each other and some good food. I am very blessed to have my family. I wish that I could bring you all here where my sisters and cousins would hold you all as they have me and take the pain from your heart. It is true love and sadly I for a long time thought that it was something else. I do however know the truth and going forward it is incumbent upon me to find that in my next lady friend. Happy New Year to you all and here's to a fantastic 2016!
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
Shotgun - I had somewhat of a rough day, too. Not for any particular reason, it was just the missing spot that H usually fills. I hate what this D is doing to my family! All my kids, along with their spouses and girlfriends were here, and we had a great time. I faked a smile all day. But I was filled with such intense longing that things were different. I'm sad about that.
When everyone left, I went to my room and cried for an hour. It was such a long day forcing myself to be happy for everyone. I just want to run away and never return. This hurts so much. I don't really have much more to say than that. Ouch.
I'm so sorry Ancaire. I cry with you and long for a peace that seems to never come. It is shocking to see the carnage that a divorce brings. I don't think any of our WAS gave any thought to what this would do to the extended family. I know that my in-laws are grieving and want nothing more than for my wife to wake up but I can't sit here and wait for it or expect it. I feel really sorry for Rouky in that her family is so far away and cannot be there to comfort her. I don't think that I have the strength to go through this without my family.
I still think that we need to have a DB LBS convention in which we would all drown our sorrows and dance our a$$es off to celebrate the friendships that we have developed here. I live in a big house and there is room for a lot of people. Probably going to have to rent a hall somewhere but to save costs everyone could sleep at my house. Some of you may have to sleep on the floor. There is a liquor store in town that could provide plenty of spirits. Who is with me and when can we do this?
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
I'm in! I wish I could do it New Year's Eve. I'd start driving right now - but that can't happen yet. Darn it. :-( Where do you live, again? Southerner, think.
Argh! My memory left me, too! Next thing, I'll see mice...
Count me in! Thank you very much for thinking about me. I think we all are survivors as Christmas was the hardest day for everyone. The way I see it is that next year it won't be as worse as by then all of us will be a better us.
It was hard for us, but WAS are in their own little world and don't really know the meaning of family as they chose OW/OM over us. It's their loss as I feel they will never deal with whatever issues they have and when the same problems will arise in their new relationship they'll have two options: run away again or stay in an unhappy relationship!
Dec 25th is the birth of Jesus, and for all of us here this date is our rebirth to become what we have always wanted to be, to become more compassionate, caring and loving.
Hi Shotgun, how are you? What have you been up to? Thank you so much for stopping by my posts :-)
Now I might get jealous if a couple of cute girls are sending you pictures :-)! Enjoy every minute of it. You are a great man and the next person in your life (W or new partner is going to be a very lucky lady indeed).
Hello Rouky thanks for checking on me. I like you have had a tough Christmas. I guess that's just how this goes. I had a lot of fun decorating and buying gifts and candy for the kids but I got up Christmas morning and my S13 wasn't there and it just took the sap out of me. I am still struggling to shake the sorrow from my heart. S13 is having a tough time and I am at a loss as to what to do. His mom and I have discussed getting him into counseling and I am going to push that after the New Year.
The behavior of my STBXW has been a little strange but she is probably having a tough time with the season as well. There is very little communication between us at this point but that is how I prefer it. I did invite her to watch S13 open his presents and she indicated that she would but when she brought him she quickly drove away. I'm not sure if I should have invited her or not and I kind of regret that I did. At any rate I feel like I did the right thing.
I am really dreading New Years Eve and just can't seem to pull myself together about it. I am no where near as depressed as I was just one month ago but it is tough. I have spoken to some friends about having a party but I don't know. I think I need to focus on my lovely friend Rouky and draw some strength from her! Praying for peace in 2016, God Bless you all.
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
Hi Shotgun, what about your family? Are they doing something for New Year' Eve? You can come round if you want.
I'm happy for you that you are not feeling as low as a month ago. You are on the right track! Keep it up. Like one of my friend said:Xmas and NY are normal days!
