Another beautiful thread title Mutatio. I hope you do not suffer but endure whatever is to come throughout the course of this thread with the same wisdom and patience you've displayed throughout your entire situation.
You are a man of great strength and an open heart, two traits that most men work their whole lives for.
Cheers to a new thread and hopefully positive developments within it.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Your a kind soul PigPen, thank you. I think we are all special here. Not everyone comes to this site, reads the book, does the work, looks into the mirror and takes the long hard look at the reflection. That takes something deep down inside to do. This quote from a Disney movie says it all:
“The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all.”
I am beginning to see changes in myself. Nothing radical, more confidence, greater self worth, less anxiety about a future alone. I am evolving.
The title of this thread speaks to me at this stage of my life. I will suffer and endure with courage or patience.
Another great thread title, Mutatio! I am so looking forward to the day where your title is something that means "Joy and love" because that is what you deserve and I certainly believe that is where you are headed. In the meantime, titikSate, you are evolving, you are a strong and kind and compassionate man and I am enjoying your progress and friendship. Wishing you a great day!
Things have gone quiet again. If she eventual decides she wants to divorce days like this will make it easier to accept. The isolation of the silent treatment is abrasive to my love. I still love my wife deeply but the lack of intimacy and conversation challenge it.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
"All Along the Watchtower" as written by Bob Dylan
There must be some way out of here Said the joker to the thief There's too much confusion, I can't get no relief Businessmen, they drink my wine Plowmen dig my earth None of them along the line know what any of it is worth
No reason to get excited,the thief, he kindly spoke There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke But you and I, we've been through that, and this is not our fate So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late
All along the watchtower, princes kept the view While all the women came and went, barefoot servants, too
Outside in the distance a wildcat did growl Two riders were approaching, the wind began to howl
I just read this about the songs meaning.
"It's cool that a 35 year old song can still get people to think and more, to discuss meaning. That's the power of poetry. I've been listening to this song since 1968 and have a few thoughts. Back then Dylan was not writing or talking about Jesus at all, certainly not in any way that foreshadowed his conversion experience ten years later. But he had written poetry for a long time about the meaning of life and our dilemmas as thinking beings. What is there to believe in? What has real meaning? is there anyone we can trust? What is the risk of stepping outside the norms and commonplace meanings of things and looking at ourselves directly? This song, I think, borrows a mythical style and setting to set up the problem of meaninglessness in our existence. The two personalities are both outsiders, a joker who lacks conventional dignity and a thief who lacks conventional morality. They are outside of the walls of psychological safety, where the regular social order still holds, despite the threats from wolves and howling winds. I read these as metaphors for the psychological dangers one must face when throwing off easy explanations of life's meaning. One must be very brave to be outside those walls. But there is no going back once you have cast off conventions -"You and I, we've been through that, and this is not our fate, let us not talk falsely now the hour is getting late." This is a crisis, he's saying, a crisis of existence itself."
I did not write this but it speaks to me.I am outside of the walls of psychological safety. This is where I am residing and have be for quite a while
She does not talk to me. She does not look at me. She walks through house as if I am not there. Having to wake up each morning and face this wears heavy on my heart.
Yes, the constant reminder of the way she feels is unavoidable.The only thing you can do is control how you let it affect you. It really tests your pma and resolve. I hope you manage to not let your feelings show,as that is not attractive. I know this, as I often have battled just to avoid being negative due to poor interactions.
Feelings change. That is a fact. You know this. That is why we persevere. Refocus on you or do something for you today.
You swing between being down because of her treatment and being calm & collected when you think of yourself. I love the attitude of the second mutatio.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
