Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
Sandi, Sorry I know I have lots of questions. I believe I read in one of your posts that you really felt a loss when you realized your H was not going to be your friend after the D. How did you realize he wasn't going to be your friend? what did he do?
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
Just hired my DB coach. First session tomorrow. Looking forward to it
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
Yeah moving out can have dire consequences regarding your kids and your visitation with them.
I notified WW last night that I would not be leaving. She didn't take it very well. Actually a pretty big blow up. I'm realizing she tries to control things out of her fear. She's realizing she doesn't have the control over me that she use to. Not being in control scares her and her go to emotion is anger.
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Keep putting one foot in front of the other and stay calm. Things can change, and they often do when you least expect it.
Keep working on you. Gym, counselor, GAL, and being an awesome dad
Love it. Thank you. I'm expecting change, praying and being the best me I can be.
thank you for the support.
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
Make sure you don't take the bait when WW tries to suck you into an argument.
I've seen several instances where the LBS allows the WAS to do what they want regarding the kids because they don't want to rock the boat and are hopeful for reconciliation. Don't fall into that trap.
Be firm but respectful when it comes to your children and what you believe is best for them. Stay in the house and don't let her bully you or suggest that she may be willing to reconcile if you were to leave the house and allow her some time. It's a trap.
Make sure you don't take the bait when WW tries to suck you into an argument.
I've been pretty good about this. I was talking to my IC about it yesterday. He wanted me to understand snapping back at her was definitely the wrong reaction but to remember how many times she has verbally attacked me and I didn't react. Anger is her go to emotion but the headphones have been helpful.
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I've seen several instances where the LBS allows the WAS to do what they want regarding the kids because they don't want to rock the boat and are hopeful for reconciliation. Don't fall into that trap.
Definitely not. I am hopeful for R but not going to give up rights to D4. The only option we've discussed is 50/50 which when I told her I wasn't going to move out I also told her I don't want to only see D4 50% of the time.
Quote:
Be firm but respectful when it comes to your children and what you believe is best for them. Stay in the house and don't let her bully you or suggest that she may be willing to reconcile if you were to leave the house and allow her some time. It's a trap.
Yeah, I saw right through this trap. She said "if you would have moved out when I first asked you things could be so much better now. I realized how much of do***bag OM was and I hardly even talk to him anymore." TRAP! My thoughts were "oh how wonderful....you hardly even talk to the man you left our home to go and have sex with and when confronted with your A you refused to stop talking to him. You're so wonderful. And you've started another A with at least one OM. You're such a great person. Gosh, I wish I would have moved out....NOT!" I'm happy I only thought it and didn't say anything.
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
WW emailed this to our mediator yesterday morning "H informed me that he will not be moving out, that he didn't care if I went to therapy, and has not been following the parenting plan. He also grabbed my arm and pushed past me this a.m. when I asked him to talk about parenting days this week.
Isn't there any way I can get orders to make him move out? I don't want to move all 3 of my children to an apartment, and the house and loan are in my name. After he pushed past me today, I don't feel safe either. "
What do I do if anything or do I just ignore it?
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
