Confused Newbie 3

[dday]

Thanks Judy. I can pretend I am happy, but I am afraid she thinks I will be her friend. I don't want that. She just brought me a hot chocolate to the ballgame, it's chilly tonight. Then W told me about the deals she got kids shopping. I feel pretty good tonight, and I really am having fun. Don't want her to think I will be her friend though. That is what I am having trouble with. I want a great M! I will not settle

[Ancaire]

I meant a friend to others (like myself) not your W.

She should be in the friendly-ish neighbor zone. Someone you know, but would not share anything other than greetings with...Very, very casual. She's lost the right to know anything more than bare bones about your life. No need to be mean, just be vague.

Glad you're having fun tonight!

[dday]

I know what you mean Judy, it's hard for me since I am so comfortable with her. It's like we are still married in public o4 something. This stinks, and I want my family back

[mutatio]

dday everything will unfold in it's proper time. Stay true to yourself and love and support your kids. If you succeed at those two simple tasks you will be well prepared for whatever crosses your path.

[dday]

Thanks mutatio, I wish the best for you too! All if us here, standing for our M should be proud of what we are doing. It is the right thing, no matter how it turns out.

[dday]

I am thankful today:

Fell asleep on the couch watching spiderman with the boys, woke up after midnight with all 3 of them on me. I miss that, so it was nice.

Taking kiddos to the zoo today.

S4 asked if we could all go home. I asked if he didn't want to hang out with me, and he said he wanted me there too. It's nice to feel wanted by these 3!

-----------------------------


I had a great time at ball last night. S6 team finally won, and it was the last game. S8 filled in on the team, so we have pics of then running the bases back to back. Pretty cool. W showed up with a mug of hot chocolate for me. I took it, not sure if I should have, but it was nice that she was thinking of me. Not sure of the motives? She wasn't dressed up at all, hair pulled up and glasses, not contacts. Kinda out of her new normal. It felt good though. Until it was time to leave. Then I'm crushed again, because we are going seperate ways. I still have the expectations that she will "wake up" and want to work on us. Any suggestions how not to have the expectations, yet still have a little hope?

[sandi2]

One minute you tell about her taking you a hot chocolate, and stress over her treating youas a friend. The next time you tell about her taking you a hot chocolate, and seem to like it and how it was nice of her to think about you..

I would not refuse to take the chocolate. Just say thanks and take it. But then watch the game and don't show interest in what she is saying. I have told you what her motives are.

And for goodness sake, stop watching her.

[dday]

Have a hard time not noticing her. I took the hot chocolate and started to walk away. Shared it with S4. She followed me into the dugout, and showed me pics of her day on the phone. Kind of a captive audience at that point. I didn't really pay much attention, honestly. She followed me, not the other way around. I didn't mention anything about her appearance, or ask how her day was. What do I need to improve on?

[dday]

See how confused I am? I keep seeing everything that W does that is nice, at a sign of reconciliation. How do you balance ignoring her with being happy, and not being a total ass?

[dday]

S8 told me last night a little more. He said he has been asking W when we would all be together again. He said W replied "soon", and " I wish we were now" I hope she isn't deceiving them.