Ghost Busting .....it's time to work on Me

[gonegrl]

I will make a deal with you Ghost. You say nothing and I will also refrain from telling my H my feelings. We can do this together, ok?

[Sotto]

Ghost, you need to recognise that saying stuff like that to your W is a poor idea. So, knowing that you won't like to see her getting ready, you just need to make your own plans. And don't make them 'in relation' to your W - just make your own fun plans and do them, because its good to spend time with your kids at your Mum's.

Have a nice time x

[Azzork]

Ghost, take your kids to your mom's house and say NOTHING.

Better yet, take them someplace awesome! Batting cages, go-kart racing, arcade, I dont know....anywhere!

[ATPeace]

Thank you

I do not have time to sort out a baby sitter my daughter is going out so I will have to go to my mums

I just do not want to see my w getting dolled up knowing she is going clubbing
Photo we have a deal I will not say anythng to my w about it upsetting me

[Azzork]

I do not have time to sort out a baby sitter my daughter is going out so I will have to go to my mums

I dont understand this. From your signature, I guess your youngest is 2 1/2. While she wont be able to DRIVE a Go-Kart, there will be enough for her to do if you take her to one of these kinds of places.

Im sure that you are capable of managing your kids all at once. Why do you HAVE to go to your mom's?

[gs9]

Agreed. Say nothing. I wouldn't even tell her where I'm going and would leave with out saying good bye or anything else.

[ATPeace]

Azz she is nearly 2 .....I changed my signature slightly

There is nothing like that anywhere near to me

Yes I will only have my eldest boy and my youngest daughter youngest son is away for the weekend and eldest daughter is out with her br

[sandi2]

Yes I have to make a choice to detach ...how,do I do this when she is being nice friendly yes her pay off is nice guy ghost me I have lost my W lover but retain my friend

Her acting friendly is not the real thing. Want to see if I'm right? Just cross her and stand up to her and see how friendly she is. That's what scares you, right? That she'll be mad at you, and you won't be able to handle her wrath. It is difficult for me to understand any man that would rather settle for some loveless friendship, instead of love. But, that's me.

W is going out tomorrow night clubbing it has been arranged however I do not really want to be at home seeing her getting dressed up perfume on markup on tight jeans etc knowing she is going out to have fun it will upset me seeing this

Okay, so this nice, friendly W is going out and having fun clubbing around, but a babysitter can't be afforded? I thought you said you inherited some money? I thought you said it had been agreed that the two of you would alternate the weekends? (I think you said you couldn't go out until after she had her weekend..... ) Hen-pecked!

Do I say something to her like " sorry but I have to go out as watching you get ready to go out knowing you are clubbing is going to upset me " or do I say nothing

Why do you ask these foolish questions, when you KNOW what we'll say? Yes, Ghost, tell her exactly the above and see how attractive that makes you look. Honestly! You know darn well you don't say that spineless cr@p to a woman who like her.

[claire7]

"We re going to the movies/fun dinner /bounce house /whatever. We'll see you later, bye!"
. Can you drop the little one with your mom and take your son to do something fun?

Be someone only a fool would leave. Would a fool leave someone who said, "I can't be around you when you are getting ready to go out because it hurts me too much "? NO.

Detach. Detach. Detach. You CAN do this.

[ATPeace]

Sandi2

You say her acting friendly is not the real thing can I ask 4 months ago we were friendly and we were married I thought happily are you saying that if she has been detaching for several years that during this time she was just acting friendly or does a ww feelings change on the date they drop the bomb to the partner.

Can I ask some advice

So she is going clubbing she would say this is the first time in 3 weeks she has been out ....so in a healthy relationship would it not be normal for her to go out every so often with mates ? She says she is not looking for guys ..who knows

Yes I could afford a babysitter but I we do not know anyone and w would not have me leave baby with just anyone I do not think I would feel comftable doing this either

Sandi you are right it would sound pretty pathetic me saying this to W

Sandi i really do value your feedback

Thank you so much

Ghost