I had to attend a meeting today in another town, was extremely excited for the meeting as it was with someone who is doing exactly what I want to do in the next phase of my business life. He was so generous with his time and expertise.
But the meeting was also in the town where my W and I would go for several getaways during the year. I drove by the hotel we would always stay at, the restaurant we would eat at and even drove by the property where we held our wedding ceremony.
I was nauseous for the first 30 minute of the meeting until I forgot about it all and then had it all come rushing back in on the drive home. All of those fond memories, all of the innocence of thinking this would be the rest of my life, all of it was just so hard to bare. I'm in a total funk now and am going to try to shake it off with a tough workout and a walk on the beach to clear my head.
Such a shame that things are where they are given how many good times we had together and how many laughs we shared.
I'm a bummed out PP.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Sorry PP. I know how sad and upsetting it can be to come across reminders like wedding spot or other places you used to enjoy. Having one of those days myself. Today, I am so flipping mad (and sad) at my H for doing this to us even though I am also to blame.
Enjoy your workout and try to move on to thinking about the positives in your life today. Tomorrow is a different day.
Hugs, BT
Me: 42 H: 40 M: 12 H moved out - 8/2015 I filed - 8/2015
Just picked up Woofie for his two week visit! He jumped up and licked my face and made a big production of seeing me which warmed my heart. I'm extremely excited to have my buddy back for a while.
My W came to drop him off while I was at work which wasn't what I had planned so I was a little thrown off by her being here. She used to be a huge part of my business but hasn't been back here since she left in January.
We spoke only very briefly, nothing about the meditation weekend or about how we were doing. She gave me a quick report on Woofie, and also told me my in laws will be moving tomorrow morning. I was hoping to see my nieces before they moved as they were also a big part of my life but have been absent since BD. I asked if I could swing by and see them before tomorrow but she told me everyone would be too busy.
We exchanged a quick hug and she was off. Definitely weird to me still to have such quick emotionless exchanges. This whole situation is still so surreal.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
"There is a little weirdness on your face as I was leaving. Everything ok?"
I guess I wasn't as PMA and smooth as I hoped. I think being in work mode and then W mode didn't let me DB as well I had planned.
Any thoughts on a response?
Seems like she is mind-reading .... I would pop back with a fun light TM "Must have been the Woofie Drool on my face .. no weirdness, thanks for bringing him by!"
I would not make much of it ... spin it to your favor.
"Of course there was weirdness on my face. For 5 years you would come to my office and pick up Woofie, drop him off, or just visit with all of us. You'd laugh with me, you'd joke with my coworkers and clients, you'd participate in our events and were friends with everyone here. Many of them were at our wedding, we've attended many of there's. Your best friend is my client's wife! You were a daily part of this community and you haven't been here for 8 and a half months.
The guy in the parking lot that you hugged when you got here, remember him? He's the guy that lived with for the entire month leading up to BD because he'd just broken up with his girlfriend. Remember all of the conversations you and I had about relationship because he was staying with us? Remember how we both agreed that we were lucky that ours was solid so we would never have to go through another break up? Remember that? That was 10 days before BD!
Thanks for telling me you were hungover from drinking too much at dinner out with another guy last night too, that was a nice jab in my day. Appreciate you letting me know.
So yes, there may be some weirdness for me to see you dropping off Woofie here and then getting in your car and leaving. Yes it's weird that I'm not allowed to see the two little girls that were a daily part of my life before they move across the country.
Yes, there's weirdness on my face, that's what it looks like when I'm trying to mask more pain and heartache than I know what to do with behind a smile.
How the (censored) can I not have a weird look on my face?"
That's the text I sent to my W after she left.
That is, it's the one I sent in my head before writing our Cali's response and numbly hitting the send button.
Back to enjoying my pup and keeping time on my side.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
.. no weirdness, thanks for bringing him by!" 