The World is A-changin'

[Zephyr]

Awesome. Glad you made it...as I'm sure with flying colors (as my daddy always said ).

Now for a Nice glass of wine and some well deserved down time with s!!!


"but when my H came in and asked I wanted to hear about his day, I said yes and made the effort to really listen and respond. I'm not sure I really had been doing that before all this."

Thought I responded to this earlier in the week. I love it. I love how you were tired, yet still showed H that what he said mattered!!!! Awesome. I know that is not the end all, but I will bet it mattered to him.

[Elly4]

Another up and down weekend. Had a great day yesterday with H and S. Then I go out today, come back and find out the OW stopped by while I was gone. Grrr

[PigPen]

HI Elly,

First off, thank you for all of the support you've been lending me. It is of great help and on my toughest days I do find solace in your comments. I hope our dogs get to meet some day.

I'm sorry you H is confusing. Making you your favorite dinner is loving and caring. Having the OW come by is not a dessert to follow up with though. Kind a douchy thing to do in IMHO.

I think on a very real level, our spouses love us. They do. They also love the life they're living. Your H wants to be with OW, my W wants and wanted for some time, this new life she's living. She told me tonight that part of the reason she left was because she just couldn't get work here in our town (very true), but it was being thrown at her in the town she now lives. I agreed. What I didn't say was that that is a total crap reason to walk out on your M. Or even to consider as a contributing factor in walking out on your M. How about we move and stay married? Gosh, who could even think of such a thing.

Until I hear otherwise, I'll assume that your H made you that dinner because part of him still very much loves you. 17 years of marriage is a long time. That's more history than my brain can fathom right now. When I read about sitch's with that much time, it honestly makes my head spin a bit. That's so many Xmas's, so many birthdays. How do you walk away from that?

And what kind of woman gets involved with a man that's been married for that long? Call me old school, and yea, I wasn't husband of the year, but I know boundaries.

I'm sorry you had an up and down weekend E. However, at least there was an up. I'm focusing on the same thing. I got to spend the weekend with my pup. As much as it hurts that she's gone again, I got to talk to my W on back to back days. In person. I got four hugs from her. One that she had to hold her breath for.

I've still got a few big ones left in me and I'm sending them your way. I hope dinner was delicious and if there are any leftovers that maybe OW chokes on them a bit.

Namaste.

PP

[Bob723]

Another up and down weekend. Had a great day yesterday with H and S. Then I go out today, come back and find out the OW stopped by while I was gone. Grrr

Hello E,

I am so sorry to hear about what happened today. Please know that you are in all of our thoughts and prayers. We're here for you.

As hard as it must be, try to shrug it off. I know you are a woman of faith, so I hope this prayer gives you strength:

"Lord God, You have chosen me to be Your child. I am a person of strength and worth because of You. Amen."

*Hugs*

Bob

[Elly4]

PP, you are more than welcome and I'm glad you are able to get some comfort from my comments.

I too have a hard time with our sitch. We have been living together for a total of 24 years. I ask myself that frequently. How does one leave after that much time and not even try to fix it. But then to be fair, did he try for years and I didn't see it? It's a shame that it takes a BD to wake us up.

Thank you so much for the hug! It was a great think to wake up to this morning. Have a great day, and I'll check back later.

*hugs*
E

[Elly4]

Hi Bob! Thanks for stopping by on my sitch. I know you've been super busy lately with your own.

I hope you have a terrific day!

Hugs
E

[Zephyr]

hey E,

I appreciate your post the other day. I am glad to help whenever I can ... I have never been a really good 'advice giver' so, I appreciate it when I am able to help a little.

I really hope your week is going well...working the kinks out at work

[V2pt0]

I too have a hard time with our sitch. We have been living together for a total of 24 years. I ask myself that frequently. How does one leave after that much time and not even try to fix it. But then to be fair, did he try for years and I didn't see it? It's a shame that it takes a BD to wake us up.

E, sorry to hear that OW was in your home. I know how painful that is.

I agree so much about how bad it is that it took BD to wake us up. My H and I are having talks that should have happened years ago, but in his mind too late. So much regret that I didn't make changes sooner.

Take care!

[Elly4]

So, finally had "that" dream last night. Dreamed my H came into the master and instigated sex. I asked him about our separation and he told me that he had decided that he had what he wanted...me"

Such a lovely dream and then to shatter when I woke up. I'm fragmented today.

[tkdmme]

I have that dream a lot. It is worse than a nightmare. I wish I could stay asleep.