have i been making mistaked too long. part 2

[tkdmme]

Below is a link to the original thread.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...142#Post2596142

I think I did this right. someone let me know if I have not.

[tkdmme]

Ok, I've navigated the sea of WAW traps today. She tried to pull me in but I resisted. Hell yea that felt good. Even went shopping for schools supplies. I took care of the boys and took care of the D12. I know I have a long..... way..... to go. I had victory for 2 days and I'm proud of myself. She hasn't mentioned moving out since monday. I'm not bringing it up. I'm fine if she does. In fact it would probably be better. One day at a time. GOD GIVE ME THE PATIENTS THAT THIS REQUIRES.

[WhyUs]

Great job tkdmme.

Baby steps and one day at a time. Keep up the hard work. Make every effort you can to resist that temptation. I know it is difficult.

I wish I would have come here before my WW moved out. I did what most of us do. I begged her or tried to talk about R almost every day.

[job]

You linked perfectly!

[tkdmme]

This morning has been good so far. I was able to make it through the weekend without any R or M talks. I cant believe how well that works. It seems she doesn't know how to act. Before discovering this site, all I did was try and talk to her about the future and our marriage and how she is making a mistake.
Without the pressure it seems that she has calmed down a bit. I am talking the DR advice about not getting too excited when seeing results. I'm just going to continue to keep my mouth shut and stay focused on the program.

School starts this week and that has added a bit of pressure to the whole family. My kids know what's going on and I can tell that is effecting them a bit.

Im still not sure if my W is moving out or not. She hasn't mentioned it this week. I know from experience that there will be good and bad days but right now im having a pretty good day.

[tkdmme]

whyus,

It seemed like the logical thing to do at the time. I begged, cried and even, in a fit of frustration, threated suicide. I did everything that DB say not to do. That is why I named my thread "have I been making mistakes too long".

Thank you for the encouragement. It has been awesome talking with the people on this site. I felt I was alone in the beginning of this nightmare but I was so wrong.

How are you holding up?

[WhyUs]

tkdmme,

I am holding up ok. I have not seen any progress in our sitch for a long time. The proverbial "it will get worse before it gets better" is certainly true in my sitch. I have a feeling things will not start changing until the divorce is final.

I have heard many people say that just when you think it is over a sudden change happens. Maybe that will happen in my sitch. There has been a lot of damage created with friends and family so the road back will be very rocky and perhaps look so insurmountable that she will not ever change her mind. Who knows?

[tkdmme]

whyus,

Remember its not over till its over. I keep reminding myself of this. Our sitch has created a great deal of turmoil within our extended family as well. My family is disgusted at how my W has been acting. My father was diagnosed with pancreatic caner 4 months ago. My W and father have always had a great relationship and she has not once called to see how he is doing.

Her family has been very supportive of me, but are not happy with the way I handled things in the beginning. I was very manipulative in trying to get my W to change her mind. This site and the DR book have me working in a way that they are proud of. I don't tell them about the book or the site but they notice a difference.

Hang in there. If nothing comes of my marriage this will still be a mind opening experience. I have become aware of my own issues and although im sad about the M im excited for my own future.

[dwh15]

Sounds like you're doing well. Just remember, you are still very early in this process and likely have a lot of hard days ahead. But definitely enjoy the good ones when they come around.

[tkdmme]

dwh15,

I know this all to well. Last week was officially the first week I started using what I am leaning from DR. I tried in the past and would only make it a few days before going back to what doesn't work. This time it feels different because I have been able to control my thoughts and worries and little better. Plus I have been GAL.

I am praying that I can make it this week the same as the last. I am beginning to know my limitations and staying away from the W as much as possible is the only way I can keep from opening my mouth and starting the reasoning again. We all know this doesn't work, but its so hard to keep with the program.

Thanks for the heads up. I hope you are having a good day.