Well dinner went very well. My H and I rode the hour trip together talked and laughed and it wasnt uncomfortable. He asked a few things about work and I had earlier sent him a message by accident thanking him for an awesome lunch.. well it was meant for someone else and I said oops sorry.. he kidded back and said get your guys straight.. I said id try.. this conversation came up again later that evening he was curious who i had lunch with... I said a coworker and he immediately assumed a guy.. I let him. Never told him the difference. Prior to yesterday I had gone dark no contact for 4 days .. he noticed how well I looked too as he made quite a few comments as well. As difficult as detaching is I think it just may be a good thing. It adds some mystery to me where ive been such an open book all these years. I will see him a bit today as we have a function to attend with our son. Lets see what today brings. Thanks for listening your help is appreciated.
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
What are subscriptions and cookies? And when someone reccomends you read a thread or someone elses posts whats the best way to find them? Waiting for my books to arrive I cant wait to read them
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
I am not mad my spouse for having the a. I am not mad that he has seperated to our rental. Im hurt and dissapointed for sure but im not mad at him. Is there something wrong with this ? Should I be angry?. Am I to forgiving this early in the sit? Maybe im protecting him... thoughts? Advice?
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
I am not mad my spouse for having the a. I am not mad that he has seperated to our rental. Im hurt and dissapointed for sure but im not mad at him. Is there something wrong with this ? Should I be angry?. Am I to forgiving this early in the sit? Maybe im protecting him... thoughts? Advice?
Grief comes in 5 stages. More than likely you aren't there yet. It is HEALTHY to feel anger as it will help you to get to the acceptance stage.
My advice is to feel what you feel. Try not to hold back the anger or you won't be able to heal from this fully.
Can someone tell me about the subscriptions and cookies mentioned in previous post . Thank you.
Azzork thank you for sharing your thoughts. Your probably right although I would have thought anger would be at the top of the list. I figure how can I be angry at him for being unhappy? I was unhappy too but wanted changes not s or d .. Well ive got changes now. Haha
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
Can someone tell me about the subscriptions and cookies mentioned in previous post . Thank you.
Azzork thank you for sharing your thoughts. Your probably right although I would have thought anger would be at the top of the list. I figure how can I be angry at him for being unhappy? I was unhappy too but wanted changes not s or d .. Well ive got changes now. Haha
If you read about the 5 stages of grief, anger is actually #3. Denial --> bargaining --> anger --> depression --> acceptance
I DONT LIKE NOT HAVING CONTROL! I guess thats an issue I didnt realize I had. Although H hasnt said im controlling I feel I must have been. I also realize how much of a persuer I am , did and continue to do. Thats part of control I dont have because in some ways im still doing it.. a reminder txt here and there.. but the silence is unbearable at times. My books arrive tomorrow . Cant wait to dive in.
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
Again what are subscriptions? So things are pretty good between H and I. My stress level has evened out some and I am able to go a few days without contact. When we talk I am calmer than before and often am not the last to txt something. We see each other couple times a week and have been able to spend time together with our adult kids doing dinner or having BBQ's. Im hoping he is thinking that he enjoys us all being together and that he would miss those times if we are not together and he chooses Ow. H actually suggeted an overnite together out of state recently but I have to work so date didnt work. I was a little relieved I acted cool about the offer and didnt make a big deal of it because I didnt want him thinking I'm dying for an opportunity do something like that. Even though I really would love to have that much alone time with him. I will not bring it up to him he will need to ask me again if he's interested. I thought that was a nice step forward. Way forward but im not jumping to any conclusions. I was pleased with myself for not going overboard with emotions either way. Time and GAL is really helping me at this point so to all newbies thinking things wont get better they do. I have been living with idea of seperation for 3 months now hes been out of house for 1.. and it is getting easier to deal with. Hang in there and listen to the vets on this site they have lots to offer. Thanks for reading and I value thoughts and opinions expressed.
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
Am I doing something wrong here.. are my posts not needy enough or challenging enough or too difficult? Am I not asking for advice in the right way... I know I sound childish right now , I own that , but I never seem to get any responses from my posts and im not sure if its what im saying that is the cause? Am I in the right forum? Im about done wasting my time posting my own and considering just viewing others although I would love to feel like I have support from others going through similiar situations. RANT DONE!
I think ive asked this question 4 times now... what are subscriptions anyway???
Married 1991 D 23 GD 3 D 21 S 20 M 49 S 48 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
