8+ months of DBing in the threads above. But I'm not giving up on my marriage and my lovely wife!
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
LOL Matt! I'll keep fighting the good fight and I'm hoping you will do the same.
I'll check on your sitch soon.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I finally had a few minutes to check in on others, but just received this reply TM from my W. It was in response to the TM Wonka suggested. I took out "Have a good weekend. Bob" since the weekend already passed:
W's TM moments ago: "Is 7/15 ok then? Did you consider putting the house on the market? It needs fixing up, but at this point it's too late. It would cost at least $5000 to get it ready and stage it for sale. I'm planning to get some necessary items when I come down, but soon will be back for most of my furniture. I hope you're doing ok - I still feel ultimately is for the best. I do care about you - I just can't live like we did before."
I bolded W's last sentence. Does anyone believe there is a good reply to her last sentence? Maybe ask her about concerns now? Or will that make it seem like I haven't been listening to her? Validate? I have validating this concern of her's several times already.
I am sorry to be so needy lately, but could use some advice again.
Sandi, having been in my W's position (similar at least), any thoughts about her last sentence?
Thank you.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
"Yes, 7/15 is fine. We have both changed, and these changes will benefit each of us in the future. Our separation has given me time to look back and realize the good we had together and could have again complete with security, companionship and possible intimacy.
I can't and don't want to live the way we did either. I am open to any thoughts you may have."
There are many ways I can respond. Taking the high road, I should at least let W know that 7/15 is ok with me. I also realize that one of Sandi's 37 Rules is to never say we have changed. The line in my draft text mentions us both. Still a "No No?"
Please help. I am very emotional right now and will not reply.
Thank you!
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
"Yes, 7/15 is fine. I can see now why you left, we can't live like we did before."
Very short and to the point.
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Rd, thank you my man. Great advice! I am not replying until I get some expert advice re: a response to my W.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
"Yes, 7/15 is fine. I can understand your reasons for leaving now why you left, we can't live like we did before."
Very short and to the point.
V
Hello V,
Thanks so much for stopping by and the suggestion. I like that! What do others think?
Bob xo
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I'll keep fighting the good fight and I'm hoping you will do the same.