Thank you pimouse. I agree God is watching over us and he has given me great comfort. Today has been very tough but I will persevere. I am trying to figure out the way forward. I pray for peace for all of us and the strength to give our children what they need. Love your Dad's advice about working hard.
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
I have to admit Rouky that I am struggling. My new job is very physical in nature and I am very tired at the end of the day. They have been very accommodating however. Everyone there knew of my illness when they hired me.
I have realized since W moved out that W did not want me hanging out with my family and friends and I am now reconnecting with them and having a lot of fun. It's funny that it was her who claimed that she had lost all of her friends during our marriage but what I remember is her having her friends come to stay with us fairly frequently. It was something that I encouraged her to do and I always enjoyed them being here.
I think it is more of a case that she threw everything into raising S13 and she spent about eleven years totally absorbed with spoiling and focusing on him. During that time S13 was a complete momma's boy and they were inseparable. About two and a half years ago it flipped and he suddenly wanted to spend all of his time with me. At that time everything changed. She started to dress differently, became very depressed about her job and started to complain bitterly that I would do nothing to change her situation. I would try to convince her to stop trying to live like a rock star and start to live a more simple life and we wouldn't need the incredible income that her job provided. Ultimately she informed me that she wanted someone to financially care for her. I simply couldn't replace her $200,000 a year job.
When she started running the bars, the men she was hanging around were all older, very successful guys. I have done my best to not pay attention to what she does but it just always pops up. The attorney that I hired said "Oh I know her, she's the one that hangs out at ........ and flirts with all the old guys".
This is all so gut wrenching but I know that I will be better off someday. I will have my health back and I will find someone who returns my love. Our son will be fine if I can do the right thing and keep my focus on him.
Thank you for your interest Rouky.
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
Was out GAL last night with some friends. Ran into an old girlfriend. She informed me that she is taking care of her husband who has cancer and that there is no chance she would abandon him no matter what happened.
Had a great time and stayed out too late. Going to need a nap today! I feel like I was cheated out of some great DB opportunities while I was sick.
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
Good on you for going out. For me GAL isn't about going out all the time, but to do something I like even if it's at home. I just sat down with a nice cup of tea and played with my dog.I feel SO much happier after this.
You are wise Rouky. I think you know what makes you happy. That makes the point that someone in your marriage doesn't. Same story here. Just be sure that you do some things that make you feel young and make you laugh. I don't drink alcohol at all but last night I ordered a beer. I only drank about ten sips of it but I was out, I had a really long conversation with a very good friend and I had fun. For me the biggest joy outside of my family is the outdoors. Always has been my sanctuary and now I have returned to work in a state park. So thankful to be where I am. Thank you again for your prayers as God has heard them and given me great peace today. I have not been this euphoric in two years. Many tough days ahead but I am ready. God bless you and stay in touch!
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
God bless you PigPen. Love the handle! I can't help but feel that if the cancer never came I wouldn't be here. I have really only been able to DB for about a month and the results are amazing. I have gained a lot of clarity since she moved out however.
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
