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Aj8 Offline OP
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But how can i prove that when she wants no contact ? She's cutt off everything , I don't see her ever calling/texting me unless it's divorce related


Me:35 W:30
7 years together
11 months married
No children
W Left me-moved to her moms: June 2015
W filed for D: July 2015
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 569
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I know how weird it is to hear this advice right now but I wish I had received this advice earlier in my sitch. Try to focus, relax, and most importantly, get the books.

Either way it turns out, your life is not over. DB is not about getting you W back necessarily, it's about you making the changes that you need to make for yourself.


Me:35 W:30
D:4 S:1
Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA
In House Separation: 01/14/15
W moves out: 04/05/15
I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15
W serves D papers: 06/19/15
Mediation: 09/16/15
D final: 12/01/15
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Aj8 Offline OP
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Thanks defacto smirk


Me:35 W:30
7 years together
11 months married
No children
W Left me-moved to her moms: June 2015
W filed for D: July 2015
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 1,647
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Originally Posted By: Aj8
But how can i prove that when she wants no contact ? She's cutt off everything , I don't see her ever calling/texting me unless it's divorce related


Let's worry about that later.

I'll ask you a question in return.

How can you prove that you are changed until you've changed?


At BD - Me: 33 Her: 33; M: 10 T: 15; D: 6 and 3

BD: 3/25/15
S: 4/20/15
D: 11/9/15
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NDY Offline
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Aj8. Hi.

You are in panick mode right now. We all did/are doing that. It's easy to say it'll get better but it's much harder to achieve it. The good folks here are telling you stuff so that you can (and you will) calm down and begin to focus. Once you focus you can embark on a plan. Small steps at a time.

Look, I'm not going to sugar coat you here. It took me months to get on an even keel but you in a small way are lucky as you found this place early. I didn't.

There is a person on here pyrite that advocated meditation. Is that something you can try?


Me:43 Her:42
M:14
S:9
EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts)
PA started 2014/05/30
BD:2014/11/05
I left 2015/10/01
I returned 2015/05/02
She left 2015/06/10
OM still on the go.
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Just so you know....

Ms. Wonka didn't speak/text/email to me for 4 SOLID consecutive months.

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Originally Posted By: Aj8
I'm devastated , I cry everyday , I'm like a zombie emotionless and then just tears.

Have you been to a doctor about this yet?
Would you consider going on anti-depressants?

I went on them at the beginning to help me cope with all the stress.
It may be what you need to be able to process this loss and figure out how to recover.
It could even save your marriage, or at least save YOU!

Think about it.


Me-70, D37,S36
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Aj8 Offline OP
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I've given it thought but right now I'm still functioning , just think about her all the time smirk and I'm listening to everyone here , God knows I need the advice


Me:35 W:30
7 years together
11 months married
No children
W Left me-moved to her moms: June 2015
W filed for D: July 2015
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,807
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I second the idea about antidepressants. They were are Godsend to me as well as antianxiety meds. They really helped me to get back on my feet to function.

Check into it if you think they may help you.


Was made a better person by DB'ers
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keep posting, let it out, your thoughts, emotions, etc. just let it out.


M35 W33 S14 D12
M14
ILYBNILWY 07/14
BD 7/14
S 5/15

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"
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