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lost18 #2570500 05/22/15 12:28 AM
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mahhhty Offline OP
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Thanks for checking in Bob. I appreciate it!

Lost....

"I do have a question for you...did your X really use all those exclamation points? Funny how I noticed that, not that that means anything but she could've dropped a few! LOL"

That conversation was copied verbatim from my phone! I know right. It is odd.

"This must be male talk because I don't understand how dropping a size and losing inches around your waist is a hit to your ego!?!?!"

You are right. Straight ego. I am in better physical condition but complaining about going down a size.


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
mahhhty #2570506 05/22/15 12:54 AM
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mahhhty Offline OP
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So so so proud of my Girl. She had a Pre-Preschool Graduation (I know I'm ridiculous right) and I am a happy father of a thoughtful smart lil' woman.

In other news. X was very pleasant today, but I made it so so easy for her. I looked good, smelled good, and was very pleasant. I saw her Grandmother, Mother, Father and Sister. All of which received me well and gave me hugs (except her). Although she was very cordial and multiple times tried to talk to me about things.

They flew out today and she called me (as I had asked her too) in order to talk to the kids about their first flight. That too went well.

But all this good news, has left me a little unsatisfied tonight. I am thinking about taking off to kayak for the next 4 days, and get the H out of here.


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
mahhhty #2570534 05/22/15 02:32 AM
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I love that you are such a proud, loving father! And any good woman will too!

We will miss you while you're out GALing! Have fun!


Me-44 (45)
H- 50 (51)
M-'96

S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)

BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas)
home Oct(sep rooms)
(EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed)
insists wants D through July 2015
no more talk of D since
mahhhty #2570828 05/22/15 09:49 PM
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Enjoy my friend!

Bob


Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS)
M:14 yrs
T:15 yrs
No children together--3 each from previous marriages
Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14
Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14
Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Bob723 #2571610 05/25/15 10:36 PM
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How was your weekend, sir?

Bob


Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS)
M:14 yrs
T:15 yrs
No children together--3 each from previous marriages
Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14
Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14
Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Bob723 #2572690 05/28/15 03:05 PM
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mahhhty Offline OP
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Had a great weekend! Paddled about 40 miles in 4 days on 4 different rivers. All and all it was very fun. I did this with 7 guys I didn't know 6 months ago. So I am definitely putting myself out there in the paddling realm. I was exhausted, but managed a small workout last night (while drinking a beer). Not my most effective workout. I need to detox a little in the upcoming week.

It was fantastic to see the kids yesterday. I truly missed them very very much!

The X & kids had a great time down south. The X sent me a video of my S & D flying on the plane, which was nice. She then called me when they landed, so I could talk to them, also nice. While they were on vacation I didn't call them at all. I didn't want to be a part of their vacation. A couple days into the vacation, my X sent me a picture of my S with camo shorts, black sandals, white thermal, and a baseball hat (that is my go to outfit). She captioned it with "I told S he looks just like Daddy." Also nice.

Mon & Tues I had meetings up north for the startup, both of which went well.

Today I noticed that the X figured out I unfollowed her on instagram, and she did the same. I also noticed that she is going through old pictures on FB and de-tagging or deleting them. Both of which are bummers, but foreseeable.

There is a piece of me who wants to ask her... "Are you happy?" Or ask her Dad or Sister... "Do you think she is happy?" or "Do you think her and I are possible?"

Obviously, this is old brain thinking. It would get back to her. And is just my own insecurities that want validation for my ideas of hope.

In the words of Squiggy, I have to keep on trucking.


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
mahhhty #2572900 05/28/15 11:49 PM
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Sounds like your GAL is in full swing. If my body permits I will be Dragonboating this summer. Love getting out on the water and paddling. Nothing else exists. No cell phones, no computers, no spouses (or exes) just you, your paddle and the water.

One thing that always surprises me with many on here is the speed of divorces.
Here in Canada you usually have to wait a year after separation to file for divorce. If there are kids involved it takes even longer. This gives people some cool down time before making a possible huge mistake.

Anyways, glad to hear you keep trucking, fishing or paddling along. smile


Di-mond in the rough
M-45 H-38
My children S-25 D-23
T 5 M 4
H left April Fools Day 2015

One day at a time!
Di-mond #2572963 05/29/15 03:14 AM
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mahhhty Offline OP
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Diana - You are so right. Paddling is definitely a flow moment. Something that totally engulfs your body and brain. You can't concentrate on anything else except that. Thank you for swinging by!


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
mahhhty #2573104 05/29/15 03:32 PM
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mahhhty Offline OP
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I read and tried to respond to a lot of people last night and this AM. I feel like there is a whole new crowd in here, and over the weekend I really lost touch with other people's situations.

In doing so, I realized that I have not revisited my plan, goals or aspirations since 12/10/2015. So I copied the old ones and modified them.

Work on me:
My goal is to be happier, healthier, and to be a better Father, Son, & Friend.

Continue to
-re-identify with myself, becoming more self-confident & self-reliant
-be more verbally supportive of her, STFU & listen
-be present (live in the moment, with no distractions when people are around)
-be happier (GAL, live a life of no compromises, live my life, be a person only a fool would leave)
-be mindful that everything is not black and white (I’m not always right, I don’t always know what is best, & I need to continue to be aware to learn from others & life)
-be more grateful, aware & appreciative
-be laid back, compassionate & understanding
-be attractive each and everyday
-work out
-travel less for day job -> then leave day job -> work for myself
-make the bed daily!

What I’d like to see from her:
-to be warm & pleasant towards me
-to pursue & approach me
-to initiate relationship talks
-to give compliments, no matter how big or small
-to show remorse
-for her to kiss me

Find Strength & Inspiration in:
-GAL’ing
-Sandi’s Rules
-Serenity Prayer
-"Be the change you wish to see in the world" - Gandhi
-"The finest steel has to go through the hottest fire." - Nixon
-With time comes clarity
-"Act as if by showing that you will be happy regardless of S's choice. You show strength by finding some new friends/activities aside from spouse. Actions speak louder than words." - Someone in the forum, much smarter than me
“I will tell you what Coach did to win me back - after I left our home and filed for D. He stopped doing all the other things that got me to the point of walking out of the door. He stopped trying to arrange my reactions. He stopped trying to control what I would think or do. He stopped telling me how I should feel. He stopped telling me what would happen if... He dropped the rope and said WITH HIS ACTIONS: "Greek, I can see that you are hell bent on leaving for reasons that you have made abundantly clear to me. Some of those reasons have merit and I will deal with them for my own sake. But I can't keep you here and I won't try. The action I will take is to work on areas in my life that have contributed to the difficulties in our R and other R in my life; I will begin to take care of myself in a way I have neglected for some time now (GAL); I will handle protect myself against the legal action you took against our M; I will conduct myself with strength and honor." This was and is totally attractive! It's strong. It's confident. It's respectful - both of me and of Coach. It's not about 'doing nothing.' It's about doing what works - putting the ACTION in the right place. -Greek”


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
mahhhty #2573297 05/29/15 11:25 PM
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Posts: 1,686
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Wow!!!! grin

Great post mahhhty. Any GAL activities for this weekend?

Your friend always...

Bob


Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS)
M:14 yrs
T:15 yrs
No children together--3 each from previous marriages
Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14
Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14
Divorce Final: 10/21/15
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