From a woman's perspective, yes, I am a woman, she is saying she is done to get you off her back and leave her alone. They threaten divorce when they feel pressured by the spouse and the only way to get the spouse to leave them alone and back it up is to say, I'm done, I'm going to file.
When they say they'll think about it, it is because they are comfortable w/you paying the bills and having the money roll in and also, to keep you hanging out in limbo. Not making a decision is a decision. Besides, if things don't work out in her little mind w/Plan A, you will become Plan B.
Keep in mind, you will never under the behavior because she is operating on pure emotions. Everything she does is because of emotions and when you are emotionally, nothing makes sense to anyone but the person who is acting out. You can't rationalize with a grapefruit...can you? Nope. The more you try to analyze her every word, comment and behavior, the more it's going to raise your anxiety level.
She's done for now, so leave it alone. She's said she's done to get you to back off and let her play in her sandbox. She's done to get you to stop pestering her. She's done for today and she's going to keep you hanging in limbo while she's doing her thing. Get off that limbo train and live your life. The wife you knew is gone. The person you see there is just a shell of the woman you loved. She's not herself, in fact she may be just the mirror image, opposite of who she was before it's over with.
KEEP THE FOCUS ON YOU! You can rationalize w/an irrational individual who is also operating on emotions and isn't thinking w/her head right now.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
"Keep in mind, you will never understand the behavior because she is operating on pure emotions. Everything she does is because of emotional and when you are emotionally wacko, nothing makes sense to anyone but the person who is acting out."
Paragraph five:
"You can't rationalize w/an irrational individual who is also operating on emotions and isn't thinking w/her head right now"
Breathe! Tomorrow is a new day and I hope you've got some fun things to do w/your kids, if you aren't working. If you don't have any plans, sit down this evening and come up w/some. I don't know what the weather is like there for you...but it's spring and it's a good time for taking walks/hikes, etc., then get some ice cream cones!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Okay. Plan something for the afternoon and do not do any work around the home. Tomorrow is a holiday and you need to take some time off husband duty and just have some fun w/your kids. Take them away from the home for a little bit and enjoy that time. They grow up way too fast and once they do, you can't recapture that age and adventure again.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
a very wise woman whose friendship and support I appreciate dearly.