Good morning everyone decided to start another thread, I have been feeling rather well lately,have been really digging into my GAL. I do miss W at times but seems like I miss her, and then it just disappears after a few minutes. I just have to remember it's a marathon.
Good to hear. I posted it in alphas thread: it's all about consistency, confidence, repetition, staying strong and truly becoming the person only an idiot would leave. If they do, so be it and you can be in peace with yourself and by then you have the ability to make someone else very happy.
Me 32 (German) Wife 28 T 3yrs M 2yrs Moved to US for W No kids BD 6/2014 In house separation Confirmed EA 1/2015 (ongoing since BD) OM not ready Real D talk started 1/27/15
Complex, that is exactly how i am feeling right now. A funny thing happened this morning. I was in the bathroom with only a towel on. W came home i didnt know she was there guess she came into My room to get the dogs. I come walking out of the bathroom and was startled to find her standing there looking at me. LOL here i am in my towel her staring at me. I was like "well good morning i did not hear you come in." She said sorry and i was like oh it's ok. You just caught me getting ready for work. I continued on about my business I felt good cause i have been working out and trimming up a ton, i could see in her eyes she was measuring me up lol! She mentioned the two bottles of beer i left on the counter and how cool the bottles looked and where i got them. I said they were really good beers, and that i had enjoyed a nice night out at this rather cool gastro pub! and i liked the bottles so had to bring them home. she asked where they came from i said one was from sweeden and the other was a local brew, she seemed intrigued, she loves unique brews as much as me! We exchanged a little bit more small talk all nice and cordial and then she said have a good day and i said the same back to her.
When i got to work i saw her carrying the dog into her department, i just started to laugh. she turned around and was like what are you laughing at. I said you are carrying Mr. Chunky man, and he looks like he is royalty, and it just looked funny, she started to laugh and stated he was spoiled. I agreed and said you take care. I hope today continues to be one of those good days!
Today is the day, W and I sit down to discuss how everything in our house is going to divided. I do not anticipate D talk but you never know. If she starts to talk about feelings do I just validateand let it be, or should I ever, engage in feelings talk. We have been separated for over three months now and feels like slowly we have inched towards total separation and eventually D. Though no talk about that stuff has occured. I am officially leave for a new assignment in august, so timing is a bit tough. Again thanks everyone.
Rysin, I hope the talk with your W goes okay, and you can agree a way forward on everything. I think if you can avoid a 'feelings' talk, that would be best. She's actively in an A at the moment, so it's going to be a cheeseless tunnel for sure.
Validation is the best way to go I think - and of course - Yes, this is a difficult thing for both of us. We'll get through it....
Good luck to you Rysin. I'm often inspired by your sitch and think you handle things with lots of confidence and self control :-)
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
I've missed your insight train. I wish I felt the same some times. Inside I am nervous and floundering but on the surface I do my best to be calm cool and collected. I am really dreading this day, just reaffirms that we are going in two different directions. Though I have known this inside when it hits you in the face it becomes more tangible and painful. I just need to stay strong.
So sorry toots, was on my phone and screen is small so thought it said train, you both are amazing with the insight. So I think the talk went very well, hashed out everything there was no talking of emotions, I did however get emotional and start to cry but only when we started on the subject of our dogs. I know I will not be able to take them with me. Very hard reality to face. I do not believe that me showing emotions for them was a sign of weakness however. What do you think? We parted on very good terms, we are going to sell and split everything. She thend out of the blue asked me if I would send her all the pictures I have of our trips together on Facebook before I delete them. I really didn't understand that one but whatever. Still no mention of divorce, but everything is playing out that way. Kinda weird any insight on that one. She also asked me not to toss all our pictures in the house!
