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2BHappy Offline OP
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Job your right and I needed to hear

My funk was here and now gone...still tooo attached is the real problem.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
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2BHappy Offline OP
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SOOOO

My H calls from work to ask me if I wanted to see 50shades of grey,,I was like I read the books and I could see the movie,,thinking he was going to buy the movie when it came out on DVD...so I said yes I would not mind having it at home in movie collection,,,

He was like no I was thinking we could go have brunch and see the movie on Monday..

It took me a minute for the invite to register,,I said Yes sure,,and I said if there is another movie you would like to see better that would be fine also,,,

Where did that come from,,,did my H just ask me out on a date?

While picking out my outfit in my head, I'm also getting extra belts to hold me in my roller coaster seat,,,I dont know how big of UP or Down this might be.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,249
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Whoa! And the movie choice! Ooo la la! Bet he couldn't wait for that to come out... he has been saving this "date" for the movie release!

Buckle up, baby! And just have some fun.

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2BHappy Offline OP
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Mighty,,,,I will have my seat belts so tight I may not be able to breathe..

I love the invite, but I will not allow myself to get my hopes up, cannot allow myself to go back to where i was emotionaly and mentally last year,,,

But I will enjoy myself.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
2
2BHappy Offline OP
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Update on date with H

It was great not exactly what I expected, but it was good

As H was dressing I ask him which shirt I should wear he picked the sexiest of the 2 I had out. I hinted to him to put on his "red sexy underware" any one remember when I found the sexy undies...he said he had not seen them in a while, but when I came back in the room he had them on:) I told him he looked great in them:)

Got to movie late (not cause of the red undies but cause H is slow), had to select a different movie for a show 1 hr later, so lunch ended up being KFC, I had on the sexiest shirt I have up in KFC eating popcorn chicken and fries..LOL

Movie ended up being Kingsman (it was ok)

On way home ran into horrible weather, took over 1 hr to get home...I thanked H said I had a great time.

We get home s14 is going a mile a minute you could tell he missed having someone home to ignore.

H and I drank a lil wine (a new one I wanted him to taste)spent a lil quick adult time, and he said lets go sit with s14 I can tell he wants to talk or ignore us...

WOW, date was kinda weird we did not talk much, but we were there together and H's idea and invite so I loved every minute of it,,and I was nervous like on a dam first date or something,,,Blouse was maybe tooo sexy for the outing, but I let that go, cause I wore it for me to feel sexy and for H to look at me and think sexy.

Now I know I know I need to NOT and I do NOT will NOT read too much into this date with H. It was a nice time, a fun date and I will take it as that. I know we still have a very long way to go in this R.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
2
2BHappy Offline OP
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
Oh H played my reggae CD all the way home and on the way there he had a couple of love songs playing...oh how I wish...I wish he would feel that way about me again.

Wished we had caught 50shades of grey...maybe another time..


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 813
2
2BHappy Offline OP
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Posts: 813
So Im struggling a little..maybe the date got me wishing but I want attention from my H.
Phone call just to say Im thinking about you..a kiss on check ...a smile.

OUR date gave me a lil hope...and now I need to reinforce my heart and stay focused on me and s14.

Even without the date I have been missing little things like that more and more...
Sometimes I think about what it will be like to be with someone who wants to be with you also.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,301
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job Offline
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It's difficult to switch your brain off, especially when you had a date w/your h the other evening...but you have to keep those expectations at zero so that you don't get hurt or disgusted. Sure, you want attention from your h, but he doesn't have it in him right now to give you that. If he can't help himself right now, how can he even think about helping you? I know this is tough, but you've got to work thru those feelings and let it go.

Keep the focus on you and your son for now.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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So, you said:

Quote:
Phone call just to say Im thinking about you..a kiss on check ...a smile.


Any harm in experimenting here?

As in like ask him to do that: "Hey H, I had fun the other night. I hope you did too, you did a great job putting things together. Do me a favor and call me tomorrow and tell me you want me"

Don't vest yourself in it, like if he doesn't complete the task (don't set the expectation he will do this).

But also monitor, if you get a call, what he tells you, etc.


Me: 43
M: 10y
S:15
ILYBINILWY 2/18/13
W moved out 2/18/13
Filed for D: 2/17/13
Got DB: 2/20/13
Got DR: 2/23/13
180 & LRT Began: 2/25/13
D Final Dec '13
Joined: Apr 2014
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2BHappy Offline OP
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Job...working hard to keep focus on son and I.

Wounded...hmmm interesting idea. I did tell him I enjoyed outing spending alone time. I dont want to bring it up again right now..giving him time to whatever..I dont want to make toooo much out of it. Next month...I might hint that another outing would be nice and see how he responds.


Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015)
H 51 (ring off 7/2013)
M 2007 T 1996
S 14
July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son
Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
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