H's MLC #7 And the games continue

[2BHappy]

I totally agree
I need to get myself back under control. Need to release this anger, sadness (I hide my sadness behind anger)and stress.

If I cannot find peace in my home with H, then I will have to ask him to leave. My health & R with S14 is way too important!!

I will find more GALs's, I will get back to attending Church on a regular. Back to counseling with Pastor. I will be telling H when I need to speak my mind. Working out.

[2BHappy]

Matt

You are also right, things are not healthly for me right now. I will make the changes in myself that I can to reduce this stress and if it does not help I will ask my H to leave.

I will always be my H's friend, we started off as friends. I don't hate my H, I just dont like the person he is right now.

I must detach as much as I can, I will continue to work on being a better me.

Keep praying for me, s14 and my H, we need all the prayers we can get!

[2BHappy]

H called 4x's in 1 hour. I ignored each one

5x call I answer,
H "I've been blowing your phone up"
Me "Oh ok what's up"
H pauses,,,stumbles "I just wanted to check on you and Jalen and to remind you to look out for a delivery to the house"
Me "s14 and I are good, s14 apologized, I apologized, we talked we are good"
H then went on to ask me about s14 glasses and again mention the delivery

H" you almost made me late to work trying to contact you..I got to rush in now"

Me before he could finish "Ok bye"

I hung up before he was even done talking. Childish but felt GREAT

I did not feel the need to answer his calls, and wish he would just leave a vm or send a text.

Are these phone calls his way of seeing if I'm stil there?
Why the most days,,daily calls when the stuff he is saying can be said by leaving a note or sending a text or why not leave a vm?

HARD to detach!!!!! Working on this, need to detach while talking and living and looking at him

[job]

I honestly can't answer why he's not leaving vm or email messages...maybe he wants to make sure you check your phone. Maybe he wants to just hear your voice and make sure you are okay or maybe he just wants to know that you are right where he left you and that you are still there for him. Whatever the reason, I wouldn't try to over analyze it. It's just another post card from Mars or a blip on the radar.

Continue working on you and moving forward.

[2BHappy]

I think he is checking to see if Im still at his beck and call.
But I hear ya and I plan to focus on being a better me.

[2BHappy]

So I told H I have something to tell him and if he could let me know a good time when we can talk. H ask if it was about the plumbing in the house...LOL

Now what I have to tell him is not DB, but I want to tell him that our current R is not working for me, and tell him that I'm starting to think its time for us to separate...

BUT as soon as I even told him I wanted to tell him something,,,I figure what is the dam point...and if he is true to form H will NOT find a good time for me to sit and talk to him anyway...

I'm not sure I'm really ready to talk to him, I need to sit very very quiet for a while.

In a response to Mighty I suggested her new thread be only about her and her kids. (something I may need to do also, harder with H in the house and reaching out to test if Im still there all the time)

[job]

Happy,
Until you can get your emotions in check, i.e., the bubbling of anger, you will need to continue posting here about your situation. If you don't, you will pop your cork again w/your son. You have to have an outlet somewhere to release the frustration.

We all understand what is going on in your home. If and when you opt to discuss your situation w/your h, just do it one evening, don't try to schedule a time w/your h because he'll never do it.

I hope you are feeling better today.

[2BHappy]

Job

Yes I can see where I should vent/post here about my H and our stitch...

But I would love a mental break from my stitch with my H.

Yes I do feel much better today, extra praying always helps me:)

[2BHappy]

Sooo

H woke me up to take our cars to car wash, then took me to breakfast OPEN doors for me (has not run to open door in a while) wanted us to wash cars together, he was then going to dry and clean out inside of my car.

Not sure where all this came from,,,I guess H stuck his head out a little today. He also was rushing to spend some adult time before s14 got back from stay over but did not happen, but he let me know he wished it had...

Not sure why I even posted this,,casue I know this is only a small poke out of the tunnel...

I always soo quick to post when H upsets me, so I just wanted to post something that was not negative

[2BHappy]

Oh wow

So I posted about Valentines day and my plans, I actually just order me 2 shirts- gifts to me:)

S14 was asking me what I wanted for Valentines day, this is probably something his dad has put him up to..

So do I buy a present and card for H just in case? Or if he does get me something, just say Thank You? Last year was horrible after the fact, the day of was good I got flowers,,,,then BAM found out OW did also a few days later...anyway

If he gets me something or acknowledges the day,,,how do I respond...Ive made my plans for myself..just beacuse I dont want to make it a sit around type of day cause I dont want to get all down in the dumps...