I have enjoyed reading your sitch and also the posts you have made to others. You sound very wise, as though you have done a lot of soul-searching before you ever ended up with this happy little DBing family.
I am just cringing at your problems with your jaw. I don't think I could function half as well as you are with everything you've got going on.
And yet you find time to reach out and help others. Pretty darned admirable.
I do hope you feel better!
--(G)GGG
Me 54 Him 63 M 23 T 29 0 Kids Funny Farm of Rescues 12/12 OW-- 5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied 9/13 Proof OW: ENDED 2/14 Got D papers on my BD I kicked him out for my sanity 9/14 He wants to "talk"?
Praying that your teeth are better today. Thinking of you and sending positive vibes your way. I like what you said in an earlier post about doing little things for your H being a way to get rid of resentment. (I am paraphrasing here, so I know that is not exactly how you said it.) That resonated with me and I am going to use that. I don't want resentment and hate to build, as I know it isn't healthy but it would be rather easy to go there and I just can't and won't. I must employ your strategy, as I think it will work for me too.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Teeth a little better this morning. Thank you all for your prayers and loving words. I will return them in due course.
Went to see the film Paddington last night with good girl friend had half price pizza. Fantastic feel good movie, lots of smiles and laughs. Really cheery. Afterwards cappuccino and girlie talk. I shared my sitch with gf and gots lots of support. Gf had a bad fall downstairs and is now classified as disabled because she was given physiotherapy when her ankle was still fractured and she now has cps. In constant pain she can't drive and her H hasn't coped very well. Her bff died of cancer a couple of years ago, so it's a hard load to carry. Anyway there is a sunny side to this, she has a disabled badge and is able to upgrade seats in theatres etc, parking is easier too. She finds the jeep easier to get in and out of; but our evenings out tire her. She is determined to go and is really great company and loves films and the cinema experience. We are planning a film day a week next Sunday ( stole the idea from RD) we will watch the hunger games and then all go to mockingjay in the cinema. I will lay on some pasta and a couple of glasses of vino de plonk. Perhaps mince pies, I need some girl power support.
Thank you GGG for you very supportive words, I am gradually working through your threads and Maybells and have had to reread some of it. I try to track your journeys as there is much to understand and some amazing advice given and taken. This DB journey is about giving and taking and to get with it I believe we need to find our voice. We soon get corrected if we are off beam. The interplay is important in developing our own thoughts, and largely a self centred act. I believe that some of the best ideas and suggestions come from involvement. This is what I have learned from others here ( in no order)
gg for her go get em attitude and fun dawn for her face her sitch, and how to hold your head up with dignity Jim for his bravery in finding his voice and his love in spite of harshness rd for his strong family values HP for his ledge hanging and his ability to learn mozza for his fighting talk ahoy for her generosity Rzr for his obvious personal growth Lisa for her remarkable gift with words and her clarity
And all of the others whose sitches are in development, even those who are not yet willing to commit
I love those 2x4 moments that the vets give which stimulate thought and forward motion. Thank you Vanilla
Last edited by Vanilla; 12/04/1409:33 AM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Drain dropped out overnight so another dentists trip. At least this time it's not a weekend. Antibs are working.
Decided not to have SSRI anti depressants. They would only be a short term solution in any case and they take 2 to 3 weeks to kick in. Besides its Xmas, the GA L time of year. I am planning GAL, in particular to reclaim my home. No Xmas decks yet, so those go up this weekend. Tonight I am going dancing with a group of neighbours to our local village bash. I mentioned it to H but at the time he wasn't interested, there are two events in the village and he is going to the other one but that's where the heavy drinkers go, so thank you but would rather go to the fun evening. Besides I would rather we were in separate places when there is alcohol about as H is generally less well behaved in those circumstances and my emotions are a little less stable if I have been drinking. I await the spewing and backlash.
There will be dancing, which I love.
Have invited glam sis for the weekend next weekend so that will be great fun too. last night was GAanon but turnout was poor. Usually gambling is out of control at Xmas and its a time when lack of funds comes to light. Should be a good day otherwise. Vanilla
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Unfortunately pain got the better of me, I ended up going to bed. There is clearly an abscess somewhere and my tooth is re packed. It feels like it is about to explode. I took a double dose of pain killers and went to bed. Am in agony still but at least gums are less sore. A crop of mouth ulcers too. Saw a different dentist and she gave me some lidocaine gel, said she had never seen so many ulcers in one mouth, she took a picture of it! Re packed everything but no injections so it really taught me to ask for injections next time. Told me not to use mouthwash with alcohol in it. Wasn't aware it had any but apparently so. Drunk on mouthwash what a thought. Accidentally got some lido on my tongue, very peculiar, not recommended.
More painkillers if it gets really bad.
Anyway had some strange behaviour from H. He did the ironing, all of it including mine. He bought some milk, mine and his. Made me a coffee twice. Hold me he had not drunk three nights this past week.
Just commented well done and or thank you and said no more. Am not trying to mind read just observing.
More books arrived so am having a duvet day.
Vanilla
Last edited by Vanilla; 12/06/1401:15 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Whilst I was sleeping H Went shopping bought fish! Can I please make a fish pie tomorrow stir fry for our evening meal which I used to make Singapore prawns He played music rather than watching sport on the TV
Observing this! Thank you H
Vanilla
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
