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Shakspr Offline OP
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So, I'll be brief.

Would it be unreasonable to request XW not ask me to back her up with kid stuff when her activity is with OM? And basically tell her she's on her honor, as I'll never ask her whereabouts.

Or, you know, always take time with the kids and simply grin and bear it.

I'm of a mind that either course of action is acceptable. I'm kinda polling the crowd for opinions.


Me: 43 XW: 43
T15 M14
D21, SS15, S11, D8
BD: 8/6
EA / possible PA discovered 9/29
D final 10/20
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I got some input today from a real life friend that is hard to swallow but probably right.

She said, it totally works in my favor if he dates and finds out its not all he thinks it's cracked up to be. Because as long as I'm not making things worse, then my grass is greener than anybody else's. In the long run.

(Open question if I'm managing to not make things worse, but considering the train wrecks that have been taking place in my small community, I'm freaking amazing!)

So I'd say, If you put that out there to your already divorced wife, the main thing you'll lose is time wih your kids. My two cents.

Sending you hugs, Shakes, I really feel for you.

BTW, I saw a small live production a few years ago of a Shakespearean rendition of The Big Lebowski. So in your honor, I'll quote:

The Knave Abideth.


Me42, H40
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A revealed: 7/13
Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15

She believed she could, so she did.
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Shakspr Offline OP
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I will look around to see if the Knave still Abideth - anywhere! ROAD TRIP!

Thank you, Maybell. That's well in line with the right side of my brain.

Anyone else? I know one thing this community has. Opinions! And I'm ASKING for them.


Me: 43 XW: 43
T15 M14
D21, SS15, S11, D8
BD: 8/6
EA / possible PA discovered 9/29
D final 10/20
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I saw it in San Francisco. smile


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Originally Posted By: Maybell
She said, it totally works in my favor if he dates and finds out its not all he thinks it's cracked up to be. Because as long as I'm not making things worse, then my grass is greener than anybody else's. In the long run.
I certainly hope so because it's my plan.


M39 D6 D3 (at S)
S 2014-09
D 2016-09

"You can't start a fire sitting around, crying over a broken heart" - Bruce Springsteen.
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Shakes,

I agree with Maybell - just savor the extra time with your kids as a gift.

Your XW will do whatever she wants right now, and there is no "honor system" right now.

Good Luck.


2 Ds: 7 and 4
BD and Sep: 7/14
Divorce Final 2/16
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Shakspr Offline OP
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Very well. I gotta admit, I wondered what 2nd XH was thinking as he dropped SS15 at XW's 3rd XH house. He didn't come to the door, so I'll never know.

It's not like we were friendly before. I'm not going to get chummy now!


Me: 43 XW: 43
T15 M14
D21, SS15, S11, D8
BD: 8/6
EA / possible PA discovered 9/29
D final 10/20
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Shakspr, buddy, you are in my prayers.


M:54, H:55
T:33, M:27
12/13 BD: EA
01/14 BD: PA, H leaves
03/14 H & OW break up
05/14 H says he will file for D
08/14 H initiates D
09/14 H wants to R
12/14 Still bungling our way through R
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Wow, Shake. That was hard to get my head around for a second.

Prayers from me too, buddy.


Me 47 - W 35
M 9 - T 10
2 Daughters - 7 & 9
Discovery of EA- 8/4/14
S - 8/5/15
D mentioned - 9/11/14
R & Piecing - 3/17/15
Regard one another as more important than yourselves.
- Philippians 2:3
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Shakspr Offline OP
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All is well. PMA is in good shape. Your prayers are appreciated, and it would seem, effective.

Interactions with XW are as good as can be for now. Last weekend w/o kids u/t Thanksgiving. Got work to do!

And...GAL awesomeness. Going skiing at Breckinridge after Christmas!


Me: 43 XW: 43
T15 M14
D21, SS15, S11, D8
BD: 8/6
EA / possible PA discovered 9/29
D final 10/20
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