Edz - Tough Times ahead proceeding with caution

[jim0987]

I still get the loneliness but not to the sane extent. Its something I'm dreading.

I think you just need to try and make connection wherever you can. Ive always been terrible at it so I don't think I'm a good source of advice here.

The last new friend I made was my W 7 years ago. That's quite lame.

[edz]

And to me dreadfully familiar mate.

[jim0987]

I'm doing a spectacular job if cheering you up aren't I.

OK so instead I'll try my D3s favourite joke.

Where do fish keep their money?





In a river bank!


(Yes I did get more lame)

[edz]

very good, same level of jokes as my sons (9)

You're all doing a good job of keeping me sane which is the best I can hope for right now guys..

Cheering me up is probably only something I can do (well W could but thats not too likely!)

[jim0987]

I feel I have to say that only we can make ourselves happy and equally only we can make ourselves unhappy.

I know its true but doesn't feel it yet. It will do one day though.

Sane is a start at least.

[edz]

My biggest issue is Im not entirely sure how to make myself happier.

Making myself unhappy is an interesting idea, theres certanly an element of being together so long and then suddenly not being and it not being right anymore. Im not gregarious though so not a lot I can do, I go out by myself fine, happy to read in resteraunts etc but I miss my W for company, talking as well as someone to be there especially as the nights get colder and draw in. Not sure what to do about that really.

[jim0987]

Thats what GAL is for - your not sure so try stuff till you find something that makes you happier.

But yes I entirely believe we make ourselves unhappy. When we put too much emphasis on someone else to make us happy, when we focus on what we've lost rather than what we have, when we have expectations that don't get met.

But if that's true then the reverse must also be true.

It sounds like you're hurting and really miss your W but that's normal so don't make it worse by beating yourself up about it. Just recognise how you feel and be OK with that.

[jim0987]

I have no idea if any if this helps

Empathy, compassion and supportive is kind if new for me.

[edz]

Well got through the evening with the movie Oblivion and some You Tube, nothing from W. Maybe she's still out with her friend, dont know. I know I miss her and I keep catching myself collapsing in that ball again, time for bed said Florence, I hope against hope tomorrow is better.

Night guys

[South74]

Edz.

Yesterday is in the past ok . Forget it and start today happy .

I try and go for a walk every morning , I have an excuse a 9 stone baby dog .
I do find that routine helps a lot .

You've got a cat haven't you well maybe every morning give her/him a brush or just play with the cat . Not saying you don't already .

South