Glad to see that life is starting to settle for you guys a bit. Please hold the weather for a few more weeks!
Furniture... well, have you thought about upscaling free and thrift store furniture for yourself? I am currently doing it in my own house - I'm sick of my stuff and want to change things up. I just finished a baby wardrobe I had, which will be a gift for my D17's pregnant behavioral therapist. It's absolutely darling!
I have so many pieces I want to do that I'm not sure what to do next. Either way, I'm going to have some really great stuff to give to D20 when she has to move into her apartment next school year.
I have a homemade chalk paint recipe, which keeps the cost down and you don't have to sand. Who doesn't love that? You can google it and maybe take a class for a shop that sells Annie Sloan's chalk paint nearby. (I use that too, though it's expensive but really great stuff.) I bookmarked a slew of bloggers who post their stuff. And most of them pick up stuff that others leave out for the trash or buy it from thrift stores. You'd be surprised at how cheaply you can make some cute finds. And my stuff is just as cute as the things you can buy on Wayfair or Joss & Main. Just sayin'. Right now, I have people who donate stuff to me as well. I have a beautiful hand made maple table with 6 hand made chairs sitting in my office. No, it is not convenient. But I'm going to get around to that soon...
Plus, you can do it with your girls. We all took a class in cabinet painting (which I'm going to do this winter). It was really fun, and my D20 is a very creative person who is good at this kind of thing. It's really fun and is my way of stress management this year. The unfortunate side is that I have a bunch of tools and stuff sitting around now.
Anyway, keep on keeping on. You're doing an awesome job.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I picked up my first microwave when I moved at the good will for 4 bucks. I actually still have it, although it is in my sons' room. Good will will have some stuff that is very affordable. Another idea...may be to register at Target and send the registration to friends. You'll be surprised how many people want to help.
As Betsey said... "You're doing an awesome job"!
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
To tack on to Eric's advice, check Craig's List. I just saw a microwave in my area for $30 and it's only 6 months old and the people are moving to a small place.
Good Will, Salvation Army and sometimes yards sales have items that you might be interested in on the "cheaper" side.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I found a flea market around the corner from my new office. I will definitely check out CL.
I'm done for the day...at least, I'm done at the office. I'm home. I'm going to take a time out for an hour or so and then, get back to it. Had such a great day. People are so excited and supportive at work. I forgot how nice it is to be treated nicely and have people excited to have you around :-)
I just texted Smokey our new address. I didn't respond to any of the other questions. I don't feel up to it and, honestly, don't feel he really deserves the time or energy. I gave him the address and I will leave it at that for today. Focus is on me and the kids and the new job...where it should be.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
I could use some support. I'm spinning a bit. I simply texted our new address at 4:30 and let it go as best I could. Do I owe him an explanation? Answers to his questions?
I can answer that..."NO."
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
He's trying to suck me back in. He walked through the house and the reality that we are gone has hit him. He is trying to get me to ease it for him. I refuse to do it. This is his pain. Not mine.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
At some point, I would respond back and say "we are enjoying our new location as we continue to settle in". You will need to address your mattress issue w/him...do you still want them or not? If you aren't planning to return there, tell him you aren't and that there's nothing else that you want from the home.
As for your daughter not cashing the check, this is one that you may want to have your daughter address. He may not realize it, but all of you have been busy packing, selling and getting ready to move.
There's no need to be chatty w/him. At this point, he doesn't need to know how your job is going. He's fishing. What concerns me is now that you are working, how will this impact your requests for support down the road...he could be thinking of how he can pay less (maybe?).
What I see is a man who very seldom came to the home when you lived there, but it sure didn't take him long to show up there and do a walk thru. Let the walls be his company for a while and the silence will give him the creeps.
Heather, I wouldn't ignore his text message totally...only address those things that need to be addressed, i.e., items left behind and the check. Oh, yeah, the key...I would send that on to him when you have time.
What else is there to say to him? Nothing, but where is your child support check. The consequences of his actions are coming back to bite him where it will hurt. He no longer has a place to call home, i.e., where you and the girls were living. It's all gone. Such a shame.
Just my two cents on what to address w/him from his text messages.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Me: We are settling in. We hoped to have a sale, but didn't have time. D12 received the card/check-haven't deposited it yet, but will do. No, I don't plan on returning. We took everything we wanted. The key is under the milk jugs. I left you the black lacquer photo album (the one he gave me on our first wedding anniv) but I'd prefer you didn't throw it away because the girls want it if you don't.
He's responded:
Smokey: Ok, the neighbors told me otherwise. where is my workbench and all my tools and the drawers to the vanity?
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
