Settlement will be signed soon. Need advice.

[topgunmb]

NewB3, it seems like the forum likes to make the posts I send your way disappear.

Out of curiosity, your signature says you have a S10. How has he handled all of this. Forgive me if I missed something reading over your situation.

I know exactly what you mean with your S3.5 acting out. Last year was horrible for my S9 when my W left. He suddenly developed this complex about not being good enough, calling himself stupid, and having dreams about me leaving him on the side of the road and driving off. Whether or not he actually had those dreams, I'm not sure. But, the message was pretty clear. Of course, W doesn't want to hear any of it because that just reminds her of the consequences of her choice to leave. Breaks my heart everytime W is here to visit and to watch the kids' faces when she leaves.

Who's to say why she's calling and asking questions. As hard as it is, I would say just let it be what it is and don't read too much into it. Keep it as positive as you can. I would say that follow the same rules as before - brief conversation and be the one who ends the conversation. Don't be rude, obviously. Friendly and polite is the best way to go. And at the end of the day, be thankful that she is still making contact with you. If any thing more develops from it, let it do so naturally.

[NewB3]

Last night was very difficult with S3 .5. He was very difficult to deal with and only wanted mommy to do everything. She was exhausted from being on her out-of-town business trip. I helped as much as I could. Cooked dinner clean the kitchen. I told him good night and she put him to bed she came down and got in bed and I went in and told her good night with a pat on the leg I said sleep well and left the room. I went to exercise and noticed there was a problem with the pan under the air conditioning. I think I fixed the problem, however, there was a lot of water. I went back upstairs to the bedroom and told her of the problem. Now we are divorced I have a new house closing soon and she will have to make any repairs on this home needed before sale. I told her that I need to go to the store and buy some things to fix the problem. Again just trying to be the guy that she'll need some day.
This morning I double checked everything pierced to be okay. I went upstairs to wake up S3 .5 and brought him down half-asleep. Walked over to her in the kitchen and said good morning. She turned around and if she did I turn so she could see his face she told him good morning and gave him a kiss and then reached around him with one arm and meet with the other and hugged us both from my back. I thought it would just be a quick hug and of course didn't feel much about it although I want to hug her back. She held us for a bit of time and then let us go to go get ready for the day. On the way out of the house today I told her have a great day and I hope everything worked out with your realtor that was coming to see the home today. She's excited for me in my new home but it feels weird to me.I know I'm being the better person and doing everything right before my exit. Once I am out I will go dark through the holidays. I do know that I will be invited to do things with her family as my S 10 wants to see them. Most of them are from out of town so I'm sure there will be a weekend or two of seeing her. This is so awkward and at the same time bittersweet.

[NewB3]

She has some family in town, so I am doing some packing today. I only have two weeks until I close on my new home. She's made it really easy, I walk into a room and ask if she has a moment she comes in and we quickly decide who gets what. No real discussions it's almost like two fFriends deciding who's going to take what from the refrigerator.
She also mentioned this morning that this will be the last week she goes to counseling with me. She said she feels were doing well at communicating and being friendly.
I told her as far as splitting S3 .5 things that I would probably not pack them but put them in the car the day I was going to take them over. She will ask about certain things in the home and then pause and wait for my reaction. She did this a few times and I finally said if you want something say so if I want something I'm going to tell you. Seems to work out neither of us and up wanting the same thing I have a feeling there'll be a few items that way before it's all said and done.
I'm kind of hurting today sad and down. She was laying on the bed while we were chatting I rubbed your on the leg and said I'm going to miss seeing these legs every day. And then followed up with and I'm going to miss your sense of humor and your smile. She replied thanks for saying that. Little does she know that once I'm out communication goes silent. I will probably not post here as much when I go dark as it makes me think of her in our relationship.

I have a song that I have found that may help anyone else hear "I won't give up" by Jason Mraz. It helps me focus on me but remember us and the fact that I won't give up.