Thanks all for your support. It made me feel better to vent it here. I will not allow him to affect my moods any longer. He has texted me twice just asking me if I found the cat. I just answered no. I am disappointed that the cat didn't find her way home. My mothers ashes arrived yesterday. I do know she's no longer in any pain so I am relieved about that. Thanks again for taking time to post cc, gb, kml & tboned
Sunday I went to a Motley Crue concert in Cincinatti - part of my GAL!! It was fun and a great mood lifter. Today I went to the zoo with my 2 brothers and niece, a beautiful day for it. I think my closing will be moved out a little further, waiting on the title company to get their sh*t together. Now i'm hoping things will return to more "normal" for me thanks again you guys (hugs)
Me - 42 exH - 56 Married 10.5 years Together 17 bomb dropped 1/6/14 signed papers 2/4/14 H moved out 2/22/14 D final 4/4/14 Dropped the rope 5/17/14 2 cats, 2 dogs
So glad to see your post. You have really been through the wringer. But I hope you are feeling a little better and I'm glad you feel some relief about your mom. You can breathe out now....
Sounds like you had some fun times the last few days - good for you. YOU deserve it! And don't think much on the title company closing - it'll get done. Never goes according to plan.
Hey, I hope your cat comes back. You know, sometimes they just disappear for two or three days and then there they are on the front porch one day like nothing happened.
(((to you))) - be thinking of you....
Me 59 H47 M12 T22 No kids BD&S Apr 2,2013 - ILYBINILWY Filed 2/12/14 OW 11/13 The Universe always strikes you at your weakest point because that’s what most needs strengthening." – Joseph Campbell
T, I'm very sorry to come here today and read that your mother has passed away. I hope that the many happy memories that you shared with her will comfort you in the days ahead.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
TL, I'm ditto-ing what T-boned says about your cat. I remember that my brother's cat went missing in Boulder. After 3 weeks they'd given up hope, but then a neighbor called to tell them that upon returning from a 2.5 week vacation, they opened up garage, and the cat was there. It had been stuck in there the entire time. Weak, but alive. They dont say that they have 9 lives for nothing! crossing my fingers and praying too.
M 56 H 52 M 13.5 T 15 S 28 twinStep Ds 24 ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14 Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14 Divorce final 7/8/14
Hi TL, So very sorry to hear about your mom. You were there for her in the end and she was better for it (as were you). About you xH's rant....what a jerk! He ran so fast from you and towards D and here he is, saying he was the one to get f*&ked. I just was posting on my thread about how the MLCer changes so very much. How in their need to feel better they see us and in your xH's case it seems, the "planet" as the "bad" guys. I sincerely hope that someday he comes out of his tunnel enough to see what an A&^ he is being! They deserve that. I think for them to truly recover, they NEED that. They should face up to the pain they have caused, to the deeds that they have done.
Glad to hear you are out and having fun. Motley Crue, huh? There's a group from my past!
thank you all for your condolences. It does mean a lot to me. thanks too for the encouragement on the cat - it's been 2 weeks tomorrow she's been gone. Leaving that in God's hands. I have no control over it anyway. Matt the Crue concert is their farewell tour so I had to go Alice Cooper opened, he's like 70 something and still put on an excellent show - I really had a great time. It was a very long drive to Cinci (I live in East Tennessee) but it was soooo much fun. Really took my mind off anything else. Tonight is pool with the girls. I feel so very blessed to have good friends now and new things to do. Talked to the mortgage guy last night, he's ready to send the paperwork to the underwriters but the exH has to sign the quit claim deed. They sent it to him Monday so hopefully he takes care of that this week. I won't hold my breath. Closing was supposed to be the 12th but I can tell that will be moved back. I'm ok with that, I'm being patient. I am not contacting the ex to see if he's taking care of it - he'll do it when he does it and I'll let the title company hound him for it. He doesn't have too much choice anyway. It's in the divorce decree which he wrote and did not want any of the equity, that's his own choice so I owe him nothing. He could potentially delay this for me but again he's the one that put it in the papers that I had to refi within 90 days, I had it changed to one year and still did it within 90 days (started it anyway) so just have to wait and see what happens with that. I will celebrate when it's over for sure. I plan on buying a new couch and rug for the LR which will change up the house, right now it's pretty much just as it was when he left other than I changed some deco around. A new couch is just what I need for a new vibe!! Going to paint as well now that I will have some extra funds. Looking forward to making this home more mine and wiping away the old memories. I've been doing little things, the other day I fixed the bathroom faucet all by myself. It is empowering to be able to do things like that on your own. Feeling stronger all the time. I'm still seeing someone new and he treats me so nice, really enjoying life in the present. I sold all the old jewelry at the gold place in town, not sure if I said that already. Better to have cash than see a bunch of memories in a box that i'll never wear again. I kept my diamond because it was my grandmothers so that had a different memory to it. All in all, today is a good day and I'm grateful!!
Me - 42 exH - 56 Married 10.5 years Together 17 bomb dropped 1/6/14 signed papers 2/4/14 H moved out 2/22/14 D final 4/4/14 Dropped the rope 5/17/14 2 cats, 2 dogs
Your ex is jerking you around if HE is one who wanted refi deadline but is now not signing. Go figure MLC. He's probably upset with himself for not asking for equity. But not asking for equity may have been due to his guilt for walking on you and your pets. You have established a paper trail proving your compliance.
I only wish...I had to fork over major moolah to get h's equity to him, but I'm in a hot real estate market and am fortunate to have had ability to do that. I figured real estate here is yielding better return than other investments, so if I sold and got the cash, where would I live? and what would I invest in that was better rate of return?
I have same issue as you with my wedding/engagement rings. They were my mom's. Dad gave to her, and after his death, it just seemed right to use them in my new marriage which was months after dad passed away. After bomb drop, and when H had taken off rings, I moved mine to my right hand. But now, even seeing them on right hand bugs me, so I've just looked at them in jewelry box for last month.
I'll keep praying for your cat to come home. Was she microchipped? I swear by that. I've had several pets over the years, and two times that microchip has brought them back home in rare instances they got out.
M 56 H 52 M 13.5 T 15 S 28 twinStep Ds 24 ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14 Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14 Divorce final 7/8/14
Hi TL, I am so sorry to read about your Mother's passing! Sending you hugs! CW
BD-Aug 2009 OW Confirmed H moves out Dec 2009 D filed by H-Mar 2010 H asks to come home April 2011 BD AGAIN 1-15-2014! H seeing FOW! H ran away again! 1-18-2014
CC - I thought about wearing the ring on my right hand as well mostly because I think it's pretty and it was my grandmothers but it still reminds me of the marriage of course so I don't. Yes the cat is microchipped, i have a live trap set up outside but have caught nothing, not even a coon or possum which i'm surprised about. I live in a heavily wooded area and when I got this cat from the shelter they said they had to trap her outside, someone had dumped her they thought. Took them several days though, but it's been 2 weeks today and i've not seen her since. I think she's out in the woods. I have a garage (that's how she got out) but most of my neighbors have car ports so I don't think she got stuck in one of those. No way to know, just hope that she does end up at the shelter so I could get her back, but who knows, I'm leaving that in God's hands too. He's handled everything else for me good so far!! Yes I consider myself very lucky I didn't have to pay equity and you nailed it, I think he felt guilty about the whole thing and that's why he was just walking away without anything. Now maybe he's regretting that decision but it's too late. I guess me signing the divorce papers right away was a good decision because I got it done before he had time to think more on it. At the time he was very pleased with himself and wanted to be "friendly" but now he seems to be in a different place emotionally. Not my problem!
Me - 42 exH - 56 Married 10.5 years Together 17 bomb dropped 1/6/14 signed papers 2/4/14 H moved out 2/22/14 D final 4/4/14 Dropped the rope 5/17/14 2 cats, 2 dogs
