Thanks unbidden. It has been a long time. Today I have changed things up a bit. W text me a couple if times today regarding signing and I have been a little rude on my responses. Told her I have an appointment tomorrow to sign. She came back saying , because I have 90 days to qualify for refinancing the home, she will probably move out soon cause she can't live like the way we have been. I responded "what ever" I will know in a few weeks. Think this might get a little bad here soon. Reality has sunk in and now I'm angry. Anyway. Think I am going to movies tonight w s and other woman.
M 43 W 35 S 6 BD 7-11 Served 5-2-13 Sep agree signed 5-12-14 Wife moves out pending refinance 5-14-14 Divorce hearing set May 2 Divorced May 2
I am angry. But I have thought about it over and over. It won't make a difference but people like him ,"The Other Person " need to know that what they do even tho the spouse cheating is at fault, hurts a lot of people. Even kids. My mother in law even suggested I approach him.
M 43 W 35 S 6 BD 7-11 Served 5-2-13 Sep agree signed 5-12-14 Wife moves out pending refinance 5-14-14 Divorce hearing set May 2 Divorced May 2
One hour and counting down before I sign separation agreement. So what's next are divorce papers. And I'm sure she won't hesitate on getting them to me as fast as she can. S and I didn't go to the movies last night w my female friend and her daughter. S was putting up a fight he didn't want to see that movie. So she said, next time.
M 43 W 35 S 6 BD 7-11 Served 5-2-13 Sep agree signed 5-12-14 Wife moves out pending refinance 5-14-14 Divorce hearing set May 2 Divorced May 2
I know how you feel about the OM. Unfortunately that will just get your W angry. IF the OW is who I think it is my H has known her for years, longer than me. She was married to a friend of his when we first got together, I've met her. 10 years ago when we separated they had an online thing/EA. From my point of view I wonder why he feels she has something to offer other than being uninhibited sexually. She obviously has no self-esteem if she's been pining away for my husband all these years. She was in an abusive relationship at one point as well...I guess we have to wait until they run there course, as hard as it is. Trust me, I've wanted to call, send letters and emails...but the question is, will this get us closer to our goal? The answer is obviously NO!
Me-44 (45) H- 50 (51) M-'96
S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)
BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas) home Oct(sep rooms) (EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed) insists wants D through July 2015 no more talk of D since
And I'm sure she won't hesitate on getting them to me as fast as she can.
Really? Why are you so sure? Do you have a special hability to see the future that others dont have?? I am sure if I dont drink water I get dehidrated, if I dont eat I will develop anemia... Those things I do know for sure, or almost...
And also you want to confront the OM? Well you can do whatever you want, at one point you were also the OM, or dont you remember when your W talked to you about her past relationships?? Do you know why you married her? Because you were a guy who accepted her no matter what...it didnt affected you her past relationships....but wait...now it does? Here is my question, when you marry her, did you marry her because you love her unconditionally OR because you were signing to have one more property? I think maybe you tough...if I marry her I own her hehehe, well guess what, you dont own her, she is free to do whatever she wants, of course she is oit of the relationship with you and that hurts, but you cant control what she does, you can only control what you do... Let her enjoy her affair, chang her hair, divorce you, remarry, do whatever she wishes, just get a bag of popcorn and watch the show, with a smile on your face, set boundaries to yourself, sandi rules and keep moving on, thats the only chance you have to see her coming back, because she wants to be with you by choice, not because you dictate her to be with you, and if she doesnt come back... Thats fine, everything will be fine.
Now, Jesus was a man, if you read his biography (the bible) you will see how confident he was, and how over the top, because he was the "son of God" ?? I dont believe in that... I believe he was a strong and confident man, he was a man who accepted everybody no matter what they did, and always forgive, because of that everybody tough he was the son of God, but at the end he was just a human being, with conditions that made him different, he loved himself, he was respectful and accepted everything that happened....man they abussed him and acussed him of stuff that you couldnt handle at the emotional level that you are now, they killed him and his last words were to forgive his muderers, so imagine what level of acceptance he had... Today millions of human beings admire him and follow him...they also defend his death and guess what? All that happened millions of years ago but the man its more famous that Coca Cola. I am not telling you to become Jesus, but to accept your W no matter what she does, because not accepting nothing its gonna change... Some couples reconcile once they accept the separation...you know which ones succeed? Only the ones that accepted what the other person did without judging...
If your W tells you today, hey hon lets get back together... i guarantee you, inside your head all your feelings will go towars the affair and in a few months the D then will be with no return point. So take this time to accept what she is and what she has become, and time will take care of the rest...
When the student its ready, the teacher will appear... Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that,It lights the whole sky.
Thank you. That's a lot to take in. I do keep my head up high around her. But today might be a little tough. Your right. Only time will tell. And if she files for divorce tomorrow it's over in 6 to 8 weeks. Am I happy? No. But I will move on. Thanks to everyone here who has given me advice. I pray that it works out for everyone and myself.
M 43 W 35 S 6 BD 7-11 Served 5-2-13 Sep agree signed 5-12-14 Wife moves out pending refinance 5-14-14 Divorce hearing set May 2 Divorced May 2
