My story, my progress, my hope

[Tinman]

Thanks for the clarification,
My comments were concerning me only. I got what Grit was saying. I was just explaining where I was in the process. I have felt like giving up but as long as I think there is a chance at sharing my life with my W I will not give up.

[Truegritter]

When he says that his marriage was dead? That he still wanted to be with his wife, BUT that it had to be with a new marriage, new boundaries, guidelines and commitment.

As if he doesn't know me...

Yes THAT is what I meant.

Very good point to clarify what I tried to say.

I sometimes forget that you would have read my whole thread to know that is what I did.

[Tinman]

OK so a couple of pretty good days. My W invited us down on Thursday to see her dad who was visiting (really good to see him) and then yesterday she was having problems with her computer and asked if I could come down and fix it then she invited us to stay for pizza and wine. Kept things very light and fun. So I have been very excited and then today she posted one of those sayings and says "Waiting for "someday" The picture says "Someday everything will all make perfect sense. So for now laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears, and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason." To me it came across as very sad and I feel like I have let her down. Wanted to post something like "Don't give up on us" or something along those lines but guessing I need to just shut up.
Any thoughts?
Basically she just told 550 of her closest friends that her life is in the toilet.

[reachingHigher]

Oh, Tinman, I wouldn't say anything. I don't read it the same way as you. Except she is just confused about her own feelings.

H & I are both big FB users and sometimes when he likes serious mottoes it makes me read into it too deeply. I asked him about it once, and he said he doesn't think too seriously, just types "like" if he feels that in that moment.

Your W may be much different, but IMHO, better not to respond. You don't need all 550 friends thinking some things about you, either.

Love the pizza and wine mixed with light and fun! makes a good memory to start the week on. Just forget about the FB thing. Years ago you wouldn't have had that window on her mind.

[Tinman]

Reachinghigher, Thanks for the advice. I agree but nice to hear from others!

[sayitaintso]

I would highly recommend not responding Tin.

IMO, she seems confused but her issues are not for you to fix or worry about.

You have your own issues you are working on correct?

What are they again?

As far as FB goes, my w's posts began to trigger my emotions pretty severely so I stopped going on (after many times of getting stung). It was a pretty simple solution.

[jks]

You could also hide her comments or "defriend" her on FB so you don't have to see it if you do go on. Just a thought.

I had to "defriend" all of H's family and friends that were associated with his family. I didn't want to see anything that they were doing without me. FB can be killer.

[Tinman]

Thanks everyone. It is so confusing for me! She has been so kind and we have spent time together as a family for the last three days in a row. It has been so nice!
Tonight her and her boys came down and I and my girls made dinner for them and we watched a movie. It was a really nice time and I tried to keep it light. Her good friend is out of town until Tuesday and her boys go on vacation with their dad on Tuesday night so guessing she won't be around much after Tuesday but at least we have created a few good times over the last few days.
I am encouraged but I really don’t know what to expect at this point. I feel like I am falling in love with her all over again and worried I am just setting myself up for another fall. Not to mention what it will do to my girls.
I know just focus on the now and be happy!

[labug]

Tin, I think you're definitely reading that thru your lens which may not be the same as hers.

I read the saying as being hopeful but that's my lens.

Who knows what hers is. Don't mindread, especially on FB.

[Tinman]

I hope so labug!! You are right who knows what she was thinking when she posted it.

So greatful for all the feedback!

Tomorrow I have a phone call with the Custody evaluator and things are looking very hopeful in that arena. If I can get that part of my life under control then the rest will be easier to handle and it would be a huge weight off of both me and my W.

Really stinks going to bed without her and waking up alone:-( I so miss her!

Good night all.