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#2225448 - 02/27/12 02:44 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
barely floating Offline
Member

Registered: 12/13/11
Posts: 750
eggie! are you having an ok day? what did you end up doing this weekend?
_________________________
Me:38.. H:33.
Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3
M:8.. together for 11.
Bomb dropped:10/17/11
Separated:11/07/11

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#2225451 - 02/27/12 03:00 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
purgatory Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/11
Posts: 825
Loc: Virginia
Long time, no post.... How ya Doin??
_________________________
M-31, H-31
T-9, M-7
S-6, s-20mth
sep 8/1/11
ILYNILWY 11/29/11
Creating separation papers.
Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12
H moves out 1.20.12

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#2225545 - 02/27/12 09:42 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: purgatory]
rickb89 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 1119
Bananarama....what's up? I did miss you this weekend. Lets see, what did I do? Went to yoga twice, did some home repairs, took son and "daughter" to a breakfast diner, had everyone over to watch The Walking Dead, read, catnapped.

I did have a serious talk with my two oldest boys. They are upset with their Mom and feel that, despite her struggles, she is wiping out our family, and they are worried she is dragging me down in a bad way. They are old enough and mature enough to see it clearly so I handle this very delicately. This is not an easy sitch, balancing being there for her, handling the boy's issues with their Mom, keeping my head above water. I have to make some big decisions soon.

Thanks for asking!

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#2225554 - 02/27/12 09:59 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
rickb89 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 1119
PURG! It's sweet of you to ask. Honestly Purg I'm at such a crossroads on what to do. I hate everything about D and what that does to everyone in our family. W is pretty far gone still and its tearing up everyone. Still trying to determine how muchof this is the illness and what is just her personality. So much to consider!

I need to catch up on your thread! Howz the neighbor kid? You are so incredible to do that, on top of a new job, and a whacky H.

Hope you're well...(((Purg)))

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#2225565 - 02/27/12 10:15 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
rickb89 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 1119
Hi guys! Hope everyone is well out there and I'm broadcasting the love to you all.

Frankly I've been walking this walk, while feeling simultaneously fearful, pissed, optimistic, lonely, loved by many, freaked out, calm, muderous rage, and serene love.

I'm constantly open to the divine, open to guidance and facing all this hardship head on. I'm not sure what to do next.

I have a woman i have loved passionately for half my life in desperate need yet is ravaging everthing around her, everyone around her. Its a study in

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#2225571 - 02/27/12 10:27 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
purgatory Offline
Member

Registered: 12/12/11
Posts: 825
Loc: Virginia
I think you've discovered what living with 'unconditional love' feels like. My hat is off to you, sir.
(((((Rick))))))
_________________________
M-31, H-31
T-9, M-7
S-6, s-20mth
sep 8/1/11
ILYNILWY 11/29/11
Creating separation papers.
Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12
H moves out 1.20.12

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#2225574 - 02/27/12 10:34 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
rickb89 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 1119
Sorry...it posted itself! I was going to say its all contradictory. There's just enough hope every now and then to keep it from being a true black hole.

I focus on me.....and I'm really in the midst of self evaluation....and I'm not in any way a prisoner to her sitch. I wonder how long one goes....missing a partner.....watching your kids suffer....?

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#2225579 - 02/27/12 10:42 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
2thepoint Offline
Member

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 1692
Hey man, your going to get frog marched off to DB jail if you don't start a new thread soon. wink
_________________________
Me48 W50 S15 S11
M20 T23
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife

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#2225581 - 02/27/12 10:45 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: 2thepoint]
labug Offline
Member

Registered: 11/24/11
Posts: 7830
Loc: Sonoran Desert
Never Rick, he just has to whip out that ... Speedo and all is forgiven.
_________________________
Me 56/H 57
M 35 S 24 S 21
Bomb 3/11 He moved out 3/11
Piecing 9/13 12/13 He's home now

The enemy is fear. We think it is hate but, it is fear. Gandhi


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#2225583 - 02/27/12 10:45 PM Re: DB'ing is sooooo hard (part 4) [Re: rickb89]
rickb89 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 1119
Purg...what does unconditonal love mean to you? If I move forward into a new life stage....and a new relationship....then did I fail her...fail me...fail my sons...and the divine? Maybe this is my test in this time on earth....can I/should I lay down my remaining days for her....be a strong as I can be...and live by a vow I didnt make lightly?

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