hope you love her, cause you're stuck with her now

[MichelleLT]

Not to knock the seriousness of our relationship, but I am surprised by how much easier this has been without an A and all the venom directed at me. It's almost easy by comparison.

[JCJ]

Oh Michelle, that is so annoying. I hate the best friends speech. I know you know it but I'll say it anyway, it's not about you hun. It sounds like he needs to work through his own stuff and ive found men have this habit of needing to do that by themselves.

So, you know what to do. You need to be your fabulous you, because you are an amazing woman michelle, but take your time to feel sad and hurt and don't be hard on yourself. You are doing all the right things, but it s!cks that you have to do it.

(((Michelle)))

[MichelleLT]

Yes that it does. (((everyone)))

[MichelleLT]

Text convo tonight (for the record he has crappy cell reception at his house, so even when he's wanted to he can't reliably call me, just for context)

Him: How u and puppy doing
Me (after several minutes of thinking and wine muddling my judgment): She's upset about you being gone. Keeps trying to get in my car after work like we're going to your house. Me? I'm angry, hurt and numb. Sometimes all at once.
Him: I'm sorry. I wish I felt differently. I do miss u both.
Me: Yeah, me too.
Him: Give her a hug for me.
Him: I don't get Monday off.
Him: But I'll still watch her Sunday and Monday.
Me: Okay.

I blame any brutal honesty on the wine. Heh.

[MichelleLT]

So, weekend with Lisette was good. Nice distraction, some talking about what's been going on, but nice distraction too.

Roger picked up puppy dog last night to have her for a couple days. I had a bunch of his stuff waiting for him to take. He still has an unbelievable amount of stuff here though. I keep finding more stuff!

He was running super late, so I was trying to get out the door to meet some friends. He wanted to chit chat though. He asked to see the radio I put in my car, I showed it to him then was letting my car warm up to leave.

Before he left, he gave me a big hug and then asked if I was coming to his housewarming party on Saturday. I'm torn. I know it's a super big deal to him that he was able to buy a house, that he's very excited, albeit overwhelmed at owning a piece of the "American dream." I know he would see it as a big sign of support if I came. But I really don't know if I want to be around all his friends. I know I'd be welcome, I know they'd be glad to see me, but it just feels like it would be awkward.

I guess the bigger question is would it be counterproductive? He says he feels like we are just friends. Does this reinforce that belief if I go to his housewarming party?

Text convo from the 15th:
Roger: Good morning. Would 5pm be fine to pick up puppy or do you want me to get her earlier?
Me: That's fine. I should be home working on stuff.
Him: Ok.
Two hours later he texts me with: if you turn on NPR, Brad Paisley is on Prairie Home Companion.
Me: That's cool, but I'm out at dog walk.

This morning:
Him: Hope you had a good time last night. I think puppy has bad dreams. She gets up, checks on me and the house, then goes back to bed.
Me: Yeah, it's possible. She doesn't understand.
Him: Yeah. If you feel up to taking her on a run at lunch that would save me travel time (he's at work, so she's inside at his house and he was going to go home at lunch and let her out)
Him: If not no worries
I haven't figured out what to say to that. I could go down, let her out and pick up some of my stuff. But I can also get it tomorrow when I'm down closer to his house at work.

I haven't initiated a single conversation with him, but we haven't gone more than a day and a half without some sort of interaction.

[kml]

He says he feels like we are just friends. Does this reinforce that belief if I go to his housewarming party?

Lol - it does if you show up with a DATE (tee hee )

[MichelleLT]

Hah. Does the dog count?

[mishka422]

If you think it will hurt you to go...then DON'T. If you think being there to be supportive of this big step in his life is going to make you feel good, then go.

This is about you....not him! I understand that your support for him could go a long way, but if you end up feeling worse because of it then it's just not worth it.

[sandycay]

Michelle ~ UGH what a icky situation but probably you can go and DB at the same time.....Get dolled up go with a girlfriend, drop a bottle of wine....stay long enough to be seen and say hello to everyone then leave because your going out to dinner (whatever) with your girl!

Tell R that you will stop by and say Hello that evening.

Don't help him throw the party or clean up from it and make sure your not there the whole evening,....make him notice your absence and dolling yourself up to go out with a girlfriend while he is stuck at home entertaining friends...is priceless.

[mishka422]

OOOOOOhhhhhh! Great idea sandy! I love it!