Well, I was just chatting with co worker that is pretty close to my wife.... I know tricky to do because words will get back to her possibly.
Well anyway, she pretty much re assured me that wife is heading for divorce. She kinda acknowledged it without acknowledging it if that makes any sense.
I am really starting to think the wife does have someone else because of all the signs.
She locks her laptop with password new email accounts that she thinks I do not know about twitter account that she will nto let me be her friend on facebook that she deletes posts occasinaly member of countless "fanfiction story" forums comments all the time on a friend she used to hang out with before me foudn out she is moving to texas and that friend will be an hour away from where she is moving she gets real defensive when I tell her I think she still likes him
I am sitting here at work and thinking of how to approach her tonight. Here is what I am thinking of saying to her:
Please read this and let me know fi I should even bother with this crap:
"Unless you can tell me otherwise, it appears you have no desire what so ever to stay or make this work. If you will let me know your true plan then we need to start working on paperwork and plans for separation or divorce, whatever it is you are wanting.
I do not hold a grudge against you for this, it certainly is against my wishes to keep our children together as a family but that is out of my hands."
Should I even bother with this talk? I mean her mind is made up anyway. The only reason for me to do this is to "think" i have some control over the situation, but in reality it will probably just hurt me more again knowing that she is still ready to leave.
Should I even bother with this talk? I mean her mind is made up anyway. The only reason for me to do this is to "think" i have some control over the situation, but in reality it will probably just hurt me more again knowing that she is still ready to leave.
To be honest, I don't think it would accomplish anything except a fight.
I think I read in your last thread that you had never thought of her having an A until I mentioned it, but if she was you didn't want to know. Don't you feel that you should know the truth? What about the children? Don't they deserve to know the truth? If they are too young to grasp everything right now, they will want to know someday, or else they will think you wanted out as much as the mother.
You have not been able to handle the thoughts of her having an A very well at all. You've been extremely upset, and I understand that, but please don't run from facing the truth...whatever that may be. What if she hasn't made up her mind....like you say she has? What if you are just assuming she has?
If you've decided that you are through with the M, then file. But what about the kids? Would you have a chance at having custody, especially if she has been unfaithful?
If you can get into her email or phone, you need evidence to know if she's emotionally involved or physcially involved with another man. Yes, she shows strong signs of being in an A, but signs are not like solid evidence.
((hugs))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I wouldn't suggest sending that message either. Talk to her straight and get some answers. Put it in your mind that she is seeing someone and set that fear to rest so if in case she is, you're not going to freak out.
Although if she's like most WAS's, she's liable to deny it.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Oh, yes....knew I was leaving something out. Another reason you need evidence, Scared. Don't just confront her and expect her to be truthful. Some women have reached the stage that they won't try to cover up, but most will deny it......if for nothing more than b/c it's easier at the time.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
